Apollonian and Dionysian
by itsmuse
Summary: Lieutenant Winters is the finest officer Easy company could ask for, but Captain Beatrice Laurenti thinks he won't make it through the war, unless he finds something that would push him to fight. It turns up Dick has got much more passion than the Captain thought. There comes the eternal struggle between reason and heart.
1. Chapter 1

_So, this is my first fanfiction. First of all, **I'm italian, so English is not my first language** so there may be some (or a lot) of mistakes. I wanted to write my fanfiction in English, in order to improve it, so please: corrections are well accepted and required, if you want to help me :) actually, critics in general are well accepted :) I don't think I've got something more to say...well, enjoy ! (I hope you will hahah)_

''You know, Nix, Freud would say he was never cuddled by her mother, never got attentions from her; maybe we should feel sorry for him.''

''You know, Bea, maybe he's just an asshole.''

''I'm sure he is. As far as I'm concerned, he's doing a great job with the men. At least, they seem to be all united against him, so that's good'' she chuckled '' and, anyway, Easy has the best men, they're all good trained. This is going to mean a lot in combat''.

Lewis knew she was right. At least, Sobel made of Easy company what it was: the best company of the entire American Army. That meant something.

''I'm not discussing this…He lacks of manners. He should be…more…I can't find the right word but he should not behave that way with the men, just like they were animals. He's making their life here even more harder than it should be and trust me if I say they're eager to get into combat sooner as they can so they will have the chance to get rid of him, in some way. You hear me? They don't even think about their true aim, they just want to kill their CO, and this is unbelievable.''

She knew what Nixon was talking about. She heard about these rumors too, which got her troubled.

''There's no way to get rid of him, Nix. They have to accept it. Anyway, they still have your boyfriend.''

''How funny, Bea'' he said turning up his nose ''but yes, they're lucky they have him.''

''I don't know, Nix'' she paused for a moment, sneering, and trying to find the right way to communicate what she thought, in order to not offend Nixon's best friend '' He cares a lot about the men, he's papa bear watching over his cubs. He's smart, he's strong, he's got discipline...'' she paused again. Lieutenant Winters was a great officer, so maybe her considerations about him were nothing, but at the same time there was something totally wrong with him , unperceived by almost everyone, and maybe Nixon was not aware of its real seriousness.

'' Nix, he doesn't drink, he doesn't smoke. He always does whatever he's asked for by his superiors. I don't think I've ever seen him laughing. He never gets angry. Nix: he's got no passion. He's like a robot, and that's not a great thing.''

''I can't get you…He's Saint Richard, sure he's not a party animal but that's exactly what made him a great officer'' he answered, almost horrified by what she had just said.

''I'll make myself clearer, Nix. Passion is what truly leads us, passion creates aims, fears, emotions. Then, the reason finds the way to reach the aim, to beat the fear, to express our feelings. Dick is not moved by anything. He only knows he wants to win this war, he only knows how to do it. What he doesn't know, it's why. He hasn't got the attitude the other men have: they want to kick those Nazis' butts off because they are insulting the concept of freedom, they want to be the best, they want to grow up here. They have passions, they have something that moves them, that makes them humans, and that will be necessary to get through the hard days. And what is going to push him to his limit? Being a good soldier is not enough. He should be moved by something to get his job done, and well done. Is it clear, now?''

He put his cup on the table, licking a drop of coffee away from his index, then looked at her in silence, took a breath and ''You read too much'' was his reply. She scrolled her shoulders, considering the fact that he was right and all those thoughts were just the results of too much philosophizing. Yes, she had to quit it. Anyway, a part of her was sure she was right. Dick was a perfect soldier, a great officer, but she couldn't help herself from wondering what would keep Dick alive, what would push him to the edge. She knew war would have proved everyone's moral and physical strength. Surrounded by all the horrors war brought along, some of them would've given up fighting, even for their own life. Dick had definitely to find a reason to fight.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

She loved her job, and she was great at it. Sure she was, or she would have never become a Captain. Yes, she was a Captain. One of the most respectable. Probably, her degree in history and philosophy got in Harvard had its importance. She knew she was made for that job and working for the Intelligence turned out to be the best choice she had ever made. She was so proud of herself: all the women working in the Army were nurses and all the men would be so rude when they were around, slapping their butts when none of their COs was looking. That could not happen to her: they had to behave. They had to show respect to her, or she would have had their butts in front of Colonel Sink as fast as they could say ''hey chick''. She thought of herself as a role model, for all the women, and for her men too. Anyway, she was not so eager to pull out her rank to everyone. Nixon could simply call her ''Bea''. He was just like her: he came from a wealthy family, attended one of the best University of the entire Country. His wasn't real rudeness, but just the way he was. It was expression of his well-known irony, and of his perspicacity. Lieutenant Nixon had never called her Captain. Actually, she was a sort of ''spiritual guide'' to him, as he called her. On the other side, Nixon would've cheered her up and she really started to consider him a sort of big brother.

There was nothing exciting to do that day, at least at the Intelligence Office. She was looking an Officer yelling orders to his soldiers. She wondered how he could find the voice to keep on doing it. Then, those soldiers didn't seem to be so upset about his voice tone. Fierce, strong, they did whatever he was demanding for. There was a chuckle on their lips and a light in their eyes. She smiled: those men loved what they were doing. Maybe, they admired their CO too.

''Good Morning, Captain''. She turned to see a sweaty and dirty redhead in her office.

''Hello Dick! How was your day?'' she smiled at him.

''Well…it could've been better. How was yours?''

''Kinda the same…too boring.'' She sat on her chair, playing with her pencils. Dick was inspecting every corner of the room.

''Are you looking for something, Dick?'' she asked.

''Actually, someone. Lewis. Is he here ?''

''Obviously not. I told him to bring me some coffee. Guess he needed a break from this stressful day, you know'' she said wryly ''anyway, he'll be back soon, I hope. You can wait for him here, please have a seat'' and she pointed at the chair which was in front of her desk.

''Thank you, Captain'' he answered, and then he sat. Beatrice stopped playing with her pencils and looked oddly at him. It seemed like he wasn't at ease with being there, still looking around.

''So, Dick, how are things going with your CO? I heard you had a sort of battle simulation today. Everything good?''

''Well…'' he paused, holding his breath for a moment ''No. Definitely not, everything's a mess with him. We failed. Major Horton was so mad at Sobel, but he had this great idea of saying that we were the ones to blame, that it was our fault. Believe me if I say it was his fault, leading us into our enemy's clutches.'' He looked frustrated. It was not the first time this happened. He looked down to his feet and to his dirty shoes.

''Don't be mad. It's everyone's first time for everything in the Airborn division. It's normal he makes some mistakes. He will learn soon'' she said, in order to reassure him.

''Can I tell you a secret?''

She looked suspiciously at him ''Yes, of course you can'' she quipped.

''I'm afraid. You know, I had this illusion that maybe I could've get out of this war, that I could've made it. Now, I'm sure I'm not going to get through it. I picture myself and my men lying on the ground and some Krauts stealing from us whatever they can. ''

She leant forward, studying the look on his face. What was it? Fear? Embarrassment?

''Dick, that's a shared fear. Everyone has it. It's normal.'' She leant back, than tried to put up a facial expression that would reassure him ''you what? That's stupid. You signed up for this. You all knew what was coming, so what's the point ? You'll die, anyway. The way I see it, it's better to die on a battlefield defending your Country, than dying in a bed. Ambitiosa morte. Do you know what I'm talking about? It was a real value for the Romans, it was a part of their Mos Maiorum. They were eager to end their life in that way, rather than simply disappearing. '' She believed in what she had said, it was the way she saw it. Those ancient values were her ''something'', the only guarantees she really got. Anyway, she was teasing him. She wanted to know why the hell he was there, and what he would've lost dying.

He raised his head to look at her, incredulity running all over his face ''surely this should be what every soldier is supposed to think. Reality is quite different.''

''Tell me something, Dick: what are you afraid to lose the most?''

He had to think about it. He missed his family. He missed his land. He missed his life before the war.

''My family. My country. Even Nixon.''

''You want your life back. Your family, your friends, the things you did before all this mess had begun. I'm telling you something Dick: you're fighting for them. You're dying for them.''

He was astonished. How rough she had been. Now he looked definitely lost in his thoughts.

''C'mon Dick'' she said, standing up ''let's go for a walk. I don't know where the hell Nixon is.''He didn't answered, just followed her out of the room, still confused.

They sat on a hill, watching the same soldiers Beatrice was observing through her window. In silence, they enjoyed the cool breeze and those atypical rays the English sun was offering.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

''Do you always do it?''

She looked curiously at him ''Do what?''

''Being so…rational.''

She laughed. That was a question heard so many times she had already the answer.

''No, Dick. Absolutely. I only think sometimes fears take over us and that's not good. Don't get me wrong, it's totally normal to have fears, but they should never ruin us. So, whenever this happens, you have to make your mind clear, you have to think of a rational solution to shut your fears.''

''Oh, our philosophical Captain!''

''This is why I made boys run away from me when I was in high school'' she chuckled.

''Really? I thought everyone was eager to hang out with America's Next Plato''

''Oh no, believe me. I was ugly back then. I could not watch my reflection into the mirror…you know, teenagers.''

''I would never thought it, you know,you're so self-confident. I envy you, sometimes.'' She didn't say a word. She was not.

''So, Captain'' he turned to his right to look at her ''what holds you to this planet?''

''Like you said: my family, my friends and my boyfriend.''

''Oh right. Your boyfriend. How is he doing?''

''Job offers don't seem to come, in this time. Anyway, he's holding on.''

''He'd better do, if he wants to…you know, have a family, with you'' he said, a blush of embarrassment on his face.

''My salary is good, anyway.''

She laid herself flat, feeling the grass still wet from the last storm. She didn't care. It's better to feel something, rather than to feel nothing. Right.

''Dick, what do you think about betrayal?''

''It's amoral'' he answered directly.

''Of course it is. Anyway, are there…any kind of betrayal that might be considered a bit…less amoral?''

''Betrayal is amoral.'' She got it.

''I don't think so…you know. Things are different, talking about a relationship.''

''Are they? Love is based on honesty.''

''Love, however you all considered it, is so damn racist. I've got a larger view.''

''What does that even mean?'' he looked at her perplexed.

''I mean…there are plenty of fishes in this damn sea…how the hell am I supposed to consider one of them my only twin soul? It's just because I met him, maybe there are other fishes I've never known about that would be much better.''

''I see what you say'' he paused, considering her idea. ''Anyway, what you say goes against the concept of twin soul, who should be the only person in the world you could ever love and the only one you can feel complete with.''

''Yeah, anyway…how can you understand that the man, or the woman, in front of you is your twin soul? Maybe there's something better. Maybe, all this ''Love thing'' is only a creation of one of those fucking ancient poets.''

''What do you feel when you're looking at your man, Captain?''

She paused. The truth was she didn't exactly know what she felt when she was with Jesse. He was cute, he had a great attitude. She liked him a lot, but she wasn't completely sure she loved him.

''I don't even remember the shape of his face'' she took off of her pocket a pack of cigarettes. She knew she didn't have to offer him any. ''So currently, I don't even remember what love should mean. I was told it's important, so maybe I should think it too. But, honestly, you know what? The only guarantee you have in this absurd world is that there are no guarantees. Even about yourself. You'll never know what you truly feel, what you truly are, don't even dare to discover it because you'll never succeed. So, what is love, then ? How could you give love a definition when you're not able to define yourself first?''

''When you feel butterflies in your stomach. When you feel your blood rushing faster into your veins at the touch of the one you love, when everything around has not a meaning anymore because your lover is right in front of you. When you can see the light even in this war, because there's love inside your eyes. I think this might be considered love.'' He answered, gazing into space.

''Do you say it by experience?''

''Well…let's just say yes.''

''So, you see a light in this war''

Now he stared at her. Her eyes were closed. He blonde hair seemed to shine bright like the sun. She looked like an angel, surrounded by the infinite green grass of that glimpse of paradise.

''Let's say yes, sometimes, Captain''.

''Please, Dick, call me Bea.''


	2. Overman

_First of all, thanks a lot **Prinzessin Mia** for your review, I'm glad you like the story! :) so...here comes the second chapter! Hope you'll enjoy!_

It was almost midnight and Dick knew he had to get some sleep, but he couldn't. His men had lost their minds, and this scared him a lot: their only concern was to get rid of Captain Sobel and they were losing their concentration. He had to admit himself he had thought about it too, sometimes. The looks he gave him, the way he talked to him made him blaze with anger and Dick had to use all his forces to not lose his control. He knew something was changing, he knew the final battle would've come soon, although it was not in his intentions. The clash was unavoidable. He tried to focus on his career's problems, trying to avoid the memory of the conversation he had some hours before with Captain Laurenti. She gave him her permission to call her Bea. She behaved like that was their first real conversation, the first time they had the chance to talk to each other without Nixon around. He knew she couldn't remember it, but that wasn't their first time. He had tried to forget it because it was too embarrassing. He had felt the need to talk to Nixon about what happened but he couldn't find the words or the courage. He had decided to keep those memories for him.

''Dick, what the hell, turn off that fucking light!''

''I'm sorry Harry…'' He didn't make a move. Flashbacks paralyzed him.

''What are you waiting for? Turn it off! Damn! Someone is trying to sleep here!''

Dick suddenly got up to sit on his bed. Harry looked at him oddly.

''I'm going for a walk, see you later.'' He wore his uniform, knowing that he wouldn't have returned home that night. Harry would've slept in peace.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

''Nix'' nothing. Lewis Nixon was in fairyland. He just snorted.

''Nix please, I need to talk.''

''Anne stole your money, talk to her'' the darkhaired whispered, still sleeping.

''Nix! It's me, Dick!''

''I stole it ok but let's talk about it later, mom''

''Damn Nix!'' Dick had almost cried. Finally, Nixon woke up in panic.

''What the hell do you want? Oh, damn it!''

''I need to talk.''

''Hell, You just couldn't wait some more hours I guess.''

''No, please, it's important''. Nixon finally got to see the worried expression on his friend's face.

''Ok, alright, I'm all ears.''

Dick sat down on the bed in front of Nixon's. He looked down to his feet. This time, again, he couldn't find the words.

''Two weeks ago you got drunk, Nix. In a pub.''

''I always get drunk. What's the point?''

''Captain Laurenti was with you. She got drunk too.''

''So what, Dick? She only wanted to get some fun like the rest of us, poor immortals who get drunk and do stupid things. Not everybody can be Saint Richard.''

''That was not what I meant. I offered myself to bring her back to her billet.''

Now Lewis was truly all ears.

Dick paused. Flashbacks returned to cross his mind.

_Bea could barely walk by her own. Dick had his arm around her waist to help her when she felt down and didn't dare to move._

_''Come on, Captain, you've got a briefing tomorrow morning! Get up, please!''_

_''No! I'm staying here!'' she had grumbled like a baby in response._

_''Ok, I'll sit here with you, alright?'' They were sitting almost in the middle of the street. It was late night, no one was around nor he saw any car. She stretched her neck, a chuckle on her lips. He had a lot of experience with those situations: how many times had he seen Lewis in that condition?_

_She leant her head against his shoulders and took a deep breath. ''You smell good'' she had said. ''Thank you'' he had answered. She leant even closer to him. He smelled her hair's sweet scent._

_''Why don't you like drinking, Dick?''_

_''I have no reason to do it.''_

_''Everybody's got a reason to get drunk.''_

_''What's yours then, Captain?''_

_''I could not stand your magnetic eyes, Lieutenant'' she looked at him winking, while he was visibly embarrassed ''just kidding, Dick. My boyfriend broke up with me. I'm feeling like a dog.''_

_''I'm sorry, Captain. His lost.''_

_''Am I beautiful? Be sincere, you have no reason to lie to me, I'm not your superior. Just tell me.''_

_''You are, I guess…'' sure Dick thought she was a beautiful woman but he wasn't so eager to make that confession to her._

_''What does it mean? Do I have a pretty face, a big red mouth or what?'' he had not the chance to answer, since her hands were already roaming over his leg, getting too close to his delicate zone._

_''Please, Captain, you're drunk, slow down.''_

_''You need to loosen up, Lieutenant. Just tonight, no one will know'' and she started to bite his ear lobe sending shivers through his body. It had been a while since a woman had touched him. He grasped his knees and bit his lower lip while she had started to kiss his neck and her hand was still teasing him over his pants. Her right hand finally succeed in undoing his belt. He didn't want to react, even though he knew he had to, but he couldn't move. He leant back his head when her hand had finally found a way to his hardness. In that moment, Dick came to his senses._

_''That's enough, Captain!'' and so he took her hand out of his pants._

_''Oh, you moron! You're the only man I know who could refuse to have some fun! What's wrong with you? Go to hell Dick!'' she yelled, pointedly angry. Dick didn't want to hurt her feelings and God knew he didn't want to refuse. His blood was still rushing through his veins, he had to calm down and still he couldn't speak. He felt the need to kiss her, to do what his body demanded for once in a while, but he knew he couldn't._

_She collected herself and now, she was sitting next to him, staring at an undefined object right in front of her._

_''You know, Dick'', she paused, lighting herself a cigarette before ''there's this German guy, he's called Friederich. He said Greek tragedies were divine when apollonian and Dionysian coexisted together in the story. Then, apollonian took over Dionysian, and those tragedies had lost their perfection. This is what happened to the whole mankind too. This makes me sad.''_

_''What do Apollonian and Dionysian even mean?'' he asked._

_She chuckled, ''Apollonian creates. Apollonian is the reason. Dionysian is passion. Dionysian is the bound we share with animals. Dionysian is what guides you when you want to fulfil your every desire.'' She paused, ''This guy talked about a sort of ''Overman'', a man who would've gone against the common morality, giving himself to his passions, facing his destiny. Now, Dick, you're a little man. You won't be an Overman if you don't let your Dionysian side have a place in your soul. Passion is what moves us, it is what makes us alive. You won't be complete, until you let your Dionysian have a part in your life. You're a slave, alienated by what the others may think or by how your God may judge you. Loosen up. Be human. Be an Overman. ''_

_''You're telling me I should do whatever I want whenever I want to be a real man? I don't think so, Captain. A man has responsibilities. ''_

_''This is what everybody wants you to think. The question is: what do you think, Dick? Wouldn't you like to eat whatever you want, to fuck whoever you want, to get drunk, to say everything that crosses your mind? Oh, damn! How life would be easier if we could be truly free! This is a built up freedom. I hate this world'' she answered, and threw up on his shoes._

''Dick? C'mon! What's the point! I want to get back to my sweet dreams, you know!''

''Yeah, sorry…well, your Captain is troubled. Her boyfriend broke up with her.''

''I didn't know'', Nixon was astonished. That was the reason why she had changed during the last few days. He had noticed something was wrong with her. She had even pulled out the rank with him, which was unusual.

''Well, I guess she didn't want anyone to know. But…take care of her. I don't want her to do something she would regret.''

''What the hell could she do, Dick? Anyway, I'll talk to her. Thank you for letting me know. Now, go back to your billet, I'll go back into my dream house made of chocolate.''

''Sweet dreams Nix'' was all he said. He could not tell his friend what happened that night. How could he explain that he hadn't stopped her on time? How could he explain he was taking advantage of her state of mind? And how could he denied he liked it? He still remembered the feeling. Her hands, her perfume, her devilish look. He thought he had been dead for a little while but that night, he had come to life again. He had nothing but the memories and a hickey on his neck which was gradually disappearing.


	3. Confessions and regrets

**Prinzessin Mia**: I loved your last comment ! It made my day! Well, I don't want to seem repetitive but...here's the 3rd chapter! Enjoy :)

Dick Winters was definitely the best friend he could've ever asked for. They were different, very different, but Nixon thought that their differences was the reason of their friendship: they needed each other to feel complete. He was his best friend.

When he had first figured out that his Captain was a woman, he was very pleased.. Months had passed by and he thought he knew her by heart. She was friendly, she told him everything about her life and so did he. The very first idea to make a try on her had disappeared since he had started to consider her a sort of big sister. It seemed like she knew everything, not only about her job. She opened him mind. Nixon knew he could trust her deeply, and so could she. Anyway, when Dick told him her boyfriend had broken up with her, Lewis felt to be put aside: why didn't she tell him? Why did she tell Dick instead? Sure as hell he was mainly concerned about her mood, but he couldn't help himself from feeling disappointed.

''Nixon, I have utter respect of your nonconformity policy but I'm sorry to tell you you should give the impression you do something here, at the least.''

''Sorry Bea, fairyland was calling.''

''And what did it say?'' she asked wryly. Nixon decided to take the chance.

''Why didn't your friend Bea tell you she broke up with her boyfriend?''

Ouch. '

''How do you know that?''

''This is the part I prefer the most: Dick told it to me! You told Dick and but you didn't think I would've liked to know!'' Nixon almost cried, his voice and words betrayed his first intentions to get to know how she was.

''Stop it, please!'' she stood up ''I didn't want anyone to know! I don't want anyone to think I'm one of those stupid girls who struggle over their motherfucking boyfriend! I'm not like that, Nix! I don't need your sympathy !''

''But you needed Dick's, didn't you?''

''No!'' she said ''I don't know how the hell he got to know it, Nix! I swear, I didn't tell him anything!''

Nixon figured out Dick hadn't glaringly told him she had. He had only spitted it out. Dick had told him he offered himself to bring her back to her billet that night, and she was drunken. Maybe, she had given it away although she didn't want to.

''How are you, anyway?''

''I'm fine!'' she answered, clearly upset by the question she didn't want to hear.

''Ok, sorry. I shouldn't have talked to you in such way. But…I was so annoyed you told Dick and not me. Just this.''

''I didn't, Nixon, trust me.''

''Oh…maybe you did. Dick told me that two weeks ago we got both drunk. He offered himself to bring you back to you billet. Maybe you told him but you can't remember it.''

''What…'' she hadn't thought about what could've happened that night. Surely, she remembered how she felt two weeks ago, when she received his boyfriend's letter, and that she decided to drink off her problems.

She sat down, trying to make her memories clear. She sees a strong harm wrapped around her waist. There is red hair on this undefined hand. Dick. A dark street. A masculine scent in his nose. White pale skin under her lips. And…Fuck.

''Damn it, Lewis'' she said, and Nixon turned to face her ''I nearly jerked off your best friend.''

''You did what?''

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

She didn't want to, but she had to. She couldn't avoid Dick Winters. He wasn't only Nixon's best friend, he was a Lieutenant, and that meant they would've got to cooperate very soon. She had to clear up things or her job would've turned out to be hard to do.

She knew Dick would've been at his billet for 9 pm. There was not any night running on his program for that day so she decided to visit him.

When she finally reached his door she felt paralyzed. Her embarrassment was huge. Still, she had to do it. She knocked on his door.

''Captain! What an honor to have you here! Please, come in'', Harry told her.

''Thank you, Lieutenant Welsh.'' She smiled at him and got herself in. Their billet was way more tidier than hers. There was a musky scent all allover.

''So…what's the reason for your visit, Captain?''

''Well…I was looking for Lieutenant Winters, I need to talk to him. Is he here?''

''Uhm, yes, he's having a shower. But I think he's going to get out soon. Do you want to wait for him here?''

''Oh…yes, I think I'll take your offer.'' She sat on a bed, clearly embarrassed, trying to mentally repeat all the things she had to tell Dick.

When he got out of the bathroom, he had only a towel around his waist and looked way shocked at the sight of her.

''Captain! I mean…Bea, what are you doing here?'' she gasped for air. The sight she had took her breath away, she could've fainted on that bed right in that moment. She felt her fingers numb, her cheeks hot.

''Oh, well…Lieutenant…Dick…I…would like to talk about…your activity with Easy Company. I have hot stuff.''

''Do you? Ok, I'm all ears then.''

''Uhm…don't you wanna…you know…get some clothes on first?''

Dick looked down at himself. Harry was unavoidably uncomfortable, feeling the tension between the two who knew he had found the right excuse to get away from their billet. Now they were alone.

''For sure…well, turn over so I can get dressed.'' She did as he had asked.

''So…Dick…truth is I'm not here to discuss your job with Easy.'' Dick turned to face her, even if he knew she was not looking at him.

''So…why did you come over?''

''Nixon wanted to know what had happened with my boyfriend. He told me you had warned him…well, thank you. I don't even remember telling it to you'' she felt her voice trembling over her last few words ''and…thank you for bringing me to my billet, that night. Did I say something more than this?''

That's it, Dick thought. No, he couldn't tell her what happened. How could he? Anyway, she was there. She wanted to know since she couldn't remember. Dick thought maybe she had the right to know.

''Oh well…you called me ''little man'', said I would never get to be an ''Overman'', or something, because I don't give my Dionysian side a role in my life…or something like that.''

''Well, this sounds typically me'' she chuckled, and Dick with her although she couldn't know ''and…something else?''

''You can turn over, now'' he said. Bea figured that Dick hadn't put on a lot, boxer had replaced the towel but he had no shirt on him. Was he provoking her? No, he would've never done it.

''So…Dick...'' she took a deep breath and decided she had to be sincere ''I think I made something I shouldn't have done. I'm so sorry, Dick. I offended you. I don't know what took over me, I…''

''It's ok'' Dick interrupted her ''It's ok, don't worry. You were wasted, and you had had a bad day. I understand.''

She sweetly smiled at him, a smile he returned. Silence invaded the room, but it didn't feel weird. She sat down on the bed and runt both her hands over her face. She had finally removed the stone from her shoe, and she felt good. Dick reached her sitting right by her side.

''Is it alright?'' he kindly asked.

''Yes…I mean, you have no idea how much it cost to me to come here tonight, to make everything clear…''

''I told you it's doesn't matter. I understand.'' The smile he was sharing with her made Beatrice melt and she felt understood for the first in a while. Dick was a great soldier, but above all, he was a great man; everyone else, in his position, would've taken advantage of that situation. But not Dick. She still thought he needed some fun, anyway, but she was sure he could manage himself to loosen up without compromising himself, which was exactly what she had done. She had utterly lost her control, that night. She was so ashamed of herself. Anyway, she had to admit she had caught herself imagining what would've been like having his calloused hands allover her body, sometimes. She had even tried to guess how a groan escaped from his lips would've sounded like. His innocence had always looked way too appealing to her and she had always wondered how it would've been like to see his animal side, so she had explained to herself the events occurred that night through the typical Freudian slip.

He laid down his bed, staring into space and took a loud breath before talking again.

''You know…something you had told me was right, in a certain sense. I mean, I don't think we could do whatever we want whenever we want, or we would live in a total mess. Anyway, you were right: I've got to loosen up, a bit, do whatever I've never done because we all know our days may be numbered and, honestly, my company is not going to make it under our Captain's control. I know I'm already dead'' she looked at him confused.

''You're apocalyptic, Dick. You don't know what the future will hold for you. Just…try to not think about it, ok?''

''But the possibility I could not make is true, it still exists. And I don't want to have regrets.''

''I think it is justifiable, Dick'' she chuckled at him.

He leant himself forward her. They were so close that Bea could feel his warm breath on her and she saw him sticking out his chest. He was gasping for air. His muscles were tensed. She realized what he was going to do. He roughly leant on her lips, pulling her close to him. There was a war in their mouths: his tongue was touching and teasing hers. She was sure she heard a chocked groan coming from his throat. Anyway, his hands were still where they were meant to be. He broke up from her lips, starting to kiss her nose instead. It felt passionate and tender in the same time. She realized Dick was that kind of man that would've given everything under the sheet. Anyway, he didn't seem to be eager to find out how sleeping in two in his bed would've been like, since he stopped kissing her and looked deeply into her dark eyes.

''Bea, I…'' and the door was opened. Harry, damn it!

''I'm sorry to interrupt you but… it's almost midnight, I'd like to get some sleep'' he sheepishly said.

''For sure, Lieutenant Welsh! I'm leaving'' she got up from Dick's bed and looked at him as nothing had never happened ''so, this is all, Lieutenant Winters. I hope you'll take my advice.''

''I'll think about it, Captain'' he winkled at her and saw her out.

He sighted and headed back to his bed with a pleased look on his face that Harry had noticed. Anyway, he was too tired to ask something, so he decided to cut Dick some slack.


	4. Dregs go along with dregs

_**Prinzessin Mia**, don't feel numb ahaha I didn't know how to thank you for your review! And, about your question: this story ( I didn't write it anywhere, sorry) is set in Albourne and I don't think Nixon (and Bea) trained with their company since their job started to concern a more ''intellectual'' training (that's what I thought reading the book); and second of all, these chapters are just to introduce the story so I wanted to focus mostly on Bea and Dick but I'd like to give a part to most of the men from E Company (Doc Roe is one of my favourite ones too!). Well, after that, enjoy the 4th chapter :D _

She sought for perfection. She didn't want the others to think she was flawless just because she was an officer thus she had to give the right example. She wanted to be admired, she wanted to reach a divine state of mind that everyone would've adored and envied. That was why she wouldn't have let herself open up too much to anyone. She built walls all around her soul and she wouldn't have let anyone get in. There were so many things hidden in her heart. That's why she didn't tell Lewis her boyfriend had left her. She may have seemed too weak. She was replaceable, she wasn't strictly necessary to someone: Nixon didn't have to know it. She felt so guilty: Nixon admired her but, first of all, he trusted her. She really cared about him and she felt a total mess since she had lied to him. And what was worse, she had still so many secrets she hadn't told him. One of those, would've maybe destroyed both Lewis and Dick.

Dick. She didn't know why he had kissed her. Was he secretly in love with her? He said he didn't want to have regrets. Maybe, he just wanted to feel a woman; she guessed he hadn't done it for a while, although his touch was still secure and passionate. Lustful. Lust. Another sin she had dirtied herself with. What if Dick Winters had a crush on her? He was a gentleman, the man every woman dreamed of. Above all, he was all the things she was not: in simple terms, perfect. Equilibrate. Oh, she envied him so. She had vices. She had flaws. Lewis thought she and Dick had a lot in common, she whished ! Oh, damn, if they had known what she truly was they wouldn't have talked to her anymore. She couldn't let them know. In that moment, a dreadful thought crossed her mind: Dick may know something. They had talked about betrayal, when she still didn't remember what she had done with Dick. Maybe he thought she would've wanted to cheat on his boyfriend with him. But she was not with her boyfriend anymore, and Dick knew that. Maybe, he had thought of what that discussion meant. Maybe he had already figured it out: she had betrayed her boyfriend. No, he couldn't know.

She recalled the day she had first thought about betraying. She was so bored, so stressed: she needed a distraction. Jesse hadn't sent her any letter for a while, she felt so lonely. What's the best solution to loneliness and boredom? Physical activity, for sure. Nixon? God, no. There were some of the men that would've appealed to her. There was a Private, Webster, he was in Easy Company. He could've fit a lot: a literature student with whom she could've discussed Shakespeare after some movement. Then she figured out literature students were so petulantly romantic. Rejected. And what was that sergeant's name? Oh, yes, Bill. Bill Guarnere. Oh, she was sure she could've been a lion under the sheet. Rejected as well: too rude. What about Dick Winters? Actually, he was her first choice. She had to admit to herself she didn't want simply to betray her boyfriend, nor had she felt the real need to get physical with someone. She was fooling herself: she wanted Lieutenant Winters. Strong arms, muscular legs, bright eyes and…oh! Red hair! The exhilaration of sin! But what she did want the most, was to see him fall. She wanted him to sin. She wanted to crash his shade of perfection, she wanted to get to see him wild, giving vent to his impulses. Anyway, corrupting Saint Richard turned out to be the hardest thing she had ever tried to do. Damn, she felt so frustrated. So, one night, while she was all on her thoughts, she bumped into a Captain. And what a Captain! Yes, what a captain…

She knew that after the previous event she wouldn't have been able to get some sleep. She knew where she could go.

Knock knock. Here you are.

''Bea? Is it you?'' the man at the door asked, rubbing his eye.

''I know it's late but…I thought we could spend some time together'' she winked at him and he chuckled in response. She knew his answer.

''Get in, come on.''

Herbert wasn't as bad as anyone would've said. They had a lot in common: they hated the whole mankind, they both felt lonely and frustrated. Everytime she told him she felt alone, he could not believe it. She was always surrounded by smiling faces. She had people all around her that admired her and the job she did. She had Lewis. On the other hand, he had no one. He knew his men scorned him, and God knew how damn it hurt. Despite his rough manners he loved his men and his company and wanted them to be the best. Damn, that was is only aim in life. Easy meant everything to him. He deeply knew he was good for nothing: he couldn't read maps nor could he run as fast as his men. That's why he hated Dick Winters. Another thing they had in common. Sobel envied Winters' capacities: he could run faster, he could lead the men in combat and he was the leader Easy sought for. He couldn't stand even Sink had noticed it. From that moment, Sobel thought Dick would've done everything to take his place. Everything he did was meant to put Sobel under a bad light. But Sobel had any intention to give up.

''Why didn't you warn me? ''

''Actually, I didn't mean to come tonight. I think I miss you.'' He sweetly smiled at her. Dregs go along with dregs. She could be herself with him, at least. She had no need to show him what she was not. With him, she could've numbered all her flaws, one by one, and he wouldn't have ran away. He needed her; he needed her because she was everything he had. She was necessary.

He tenderly kissed her lips and draw her to his bed. They laid down close. When Sobel made a try to undress her she stopped him.

''Not today. Just…just hug me, please.''

He kissed her forehead and pulled her closer to him. They felt asleep: she wouldn't let her guilt take over. She didn't think of Dick or Lewis. She was free.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

She managed herself to wriggle out of Sobel's billet without being caught in the morning. She felt strong and ready for her briefing with Colonel Sink.

She liked to have that kind of power on her superiors. She was the first to know everything, it was her job. She informed Sink about her latest discovers: where Germans were located, how many supplies they had, their number, they strength. Sink was carefully paying attention to her.

''So, Captain, what do you think about it? Are we going to find a strong resistance ?'' Sink asked. Clearly, he didn't want her personal idea, but a clear and objective answer.

''Honestly, they are warn-out. They've been fighting this war for a long time and recently they got a good hiding, sir. They are forceless. But, they are still united by their national pride which makes them confident and relentless. We have to watch out, sir. They may have still some ace in the hole.''

Sink didn't seem to care a lot. He didn't say a word and seemed to be caught up by his own thoughts, forgetting the presence of Bea and Lewis in front of him, who were giving each other a disoriented look.

''Sir…is it all for today?'' she sheepishly asked.

''Oh yes, dismissed. Thank you Captain Laurenti, and thank you Lieutenant Nixon.'' They saluted their colonel and got out of his office.

''Nix, do you think he heard the first part of what I said, or the second one?'' she asked, referring to her last words.

''I don't know. I hope he will consider all the possibilities. These Germans are smartasses.''

A look of concern appeared on her face. She knew they would've get into mission soon. Somehow, she would've missed Albourne: there they had everything they needed and war seemed to be so far.

''So…have you talked to Dick?''

''Yes, I have'' she said back, nodding and feeling her checks turning hot. Damn, had she to tell him about the kiss?

''And…?''

''He kissed me.''

''Wow, that was unexpected'' but his voice didn't seem to show any surprise ''just a kiss, eh? Any wandering hand?''

''No, Nix…it was…passionate, but tender. He said he didn't want to have regrets, that he wanted to do all the things he had never done.''

''He gave his first kiss, as far as I know.''

''Well…maybe he wanted to give his last one, don't you think so?'' now she was trying to get the truth out of Nixon, as a real Intelligence officer.

''Maybe…or there might be something more. Maybe he likes you.''

''Does he?''

Lewis gave her a questioning look. She had to know he couldn't really give out all his best friend's secrets.

''He had never told me anything about his feelings about you. But…you know, there are some things that could make me think he likes you. I don't know how to explain it.'' Truth was, Nixon hadn't noticed anything. He was taken aback by what his friend had done because he didn't see that coming. But, if he had kissed her, maybe Dick was hiding him something.

''Ok, got it, you don't want to betray your boyfriend, I understand'' she chuckled. Lewis was too engaged in his own thoughts to notice the joke.

''What if he liked you? I mean…he's a good man. Would you like him back? ''

She was taken aback by that question. Oh, Nix, don't do this to me.

''Do you really want me to be sincere?'' he nodded.

''I'm attracted by his innocence shade. I wouldn't dislike a night with him'' she winkled at him and he gave her a surprise look in response.

''But…he's not that kind of guy. He surely wants a girl to settle with and I don't want anyone now. Besides, you know I don't really like the way he is. I don't find frigidity so appealing.''

''Bea, I think you're too surrounded by men and you're starting to think as one'' he laughed because he found it funny. It wasn't. She gave him an insecure smile and headed back to her office.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

They had never hung up together and she wasn't so comfortable with the idea. What if someone would've noticed them? She was standing in the dark where they were meant to meet. He was late: he had told her he would've had a meeting with Major Horton, so she wasn't angry. She patiently waited for him to show up and when she saw a tall figure coming towards her she thought her waiting had come to an end. What a mistake.

''Dick!''

He stopped running and gave her a sweet look.

''Hi, Bea. What are you doing here?''

''I…'' _Damn_ ''just taking a breath, you know. And you?''

''As well. I went running, I needed to clear my mind'' he chuckled at her.

''And would you mind telling me what is troubling your peaceful mind?''

''You.'' She was melting. She felt naked under his blue eyes which were inspecting her waiting for an answer. They were so close she could feel him breathing heavily.

''I'm so sorry I'm a problem to you'' she said, visibly guilty.

''Don't even say it again'' he pulled her close to him and caught her lips with his. He was eating her up. Devouring her. Their tongues danced together for a while until he decided to inspect each corner of her mouth with his. His lips were roughly colliding with hers, a groan of desire escaped from his; she felt herself fainting at such sound. He desired her. His hand caressing her hair sent shivers all along her spine. She could feel his body pressed against her which made her feel so small. Now his arms were wrapping her and she could feel them trying to explore her body. In that moment, she recalled the reason why she was outside in the cold and separated from him. Dick seemed so displeased.

''I'm sorry if I let go a little bit, but you look so beautiful tonight. I can't resist you.''

She turned red.

''You did nothing, Dick but…we're outside, someone could see us.''

''Right'' he smiled at her ''so…I'd better go having a shower, I think.''

''Ok, goodnight Dick.''

''Goodnight, Bea.'' He gave her a kiss on her forehead and left.

It was almost midnight. Sobel didn't seem to arrive. It was too cold so she decided to go back to her billet, wondering why Sobel didn't come over. Had he something better to do? Was she replaceable, even for him?

At the same time, someone could not close his eye. That fucking little red-haired dared to kiss his girl! That was the last straw ! It was the beginning of the end: he wanted Dick Winters to disappear from that world.


	5. Take off, then fall

_I'm so, so sorry I didn't publish this chapter before! I was busy (studying grrrr). Well, I'd like to thank **Prinzessin Mia** (I may look repetitive, but your comments make my day hahaha) and **Miss Avenger**: I'm so glad you like the story!_

_Just a few more things:_

_1) this chapter is a long one, since I wanted to solve the whole Sobel's thing which acts as a springboard for the whole fanfiction;_

_2) T**he title may seem incorrect**, since you native would've said ''Take off then land'' but...I think you'll understand why I chose ''fall'' instead ;) ;_

3) since I'm so daaaamn busy because of my studies, I had to time to check the grammar and everything so **there might be some more errors since, remember, English is not my first language **(I'm italian) but I'd be deeply grateful if you could make me notice my mistakes so that I could improve my English (I'm writing this fanfiction for this reason, too).

Well...that's enough, I'm not going to bore you anymore hahaha enjoy!

Since their very first kiss, Dick managed himself to get some decent sleep. Truth was, since they had arrived in Albourne he seemed to not be able to rest in peace. In fact, something troubled his mind every time he closed his eyes. He started to see things he didn't want to: blood, destruction: his men dropped dead on the ground, some Nazi shooting at his best friends, children crying for their parents. He didn't seem to imagine of his death could've been: in a sense, he wasn't afraid of death. He knew he could've felt pain, or maybe it could've been fast; anyway, everything would've come to an end. What scared him the most was the possibility to lose all the ones he loved. Above all, he didn't want to see Nixon dying. Losing him would've meant he was dead. He didn't want to see his bloody body. He could not even imagine to write a letter to his wife telling her that her husband was killed. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw all this and every time he found himself shaking at the thought, and he just couldn't stop it.

Somehow, Bea had taken all those nightmarish thoughts away and brought a light into his life. He felt his heart beating again, and not out of fear. It was life, it was pure. He didn't think he was in love with her but he had to admit that being so close to a woman was something he needed. He wanted to feel touched, he wanted to feel intoxicated by her perfume. He wanted contact. Maybe, he thought, feeling her body against his would've reminded him he was alive. He could feel, he could touch, he could kiss. He could give joy. He smiled at himself. Everything looked bright now. He had found strength into her kisses and he was ready to go to war, to do of his best. He felt energy in his body and for the first time since he got in Albourne, he thought his friends would've survived: he had energies enough to protect them all. He smiled again and finally fell asleep.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Running was their program of the day. Those warm days had made this task even more difficult than it was, but Dick didn't care. That day, he wanted to enjoy every minute he could with his men.

They were ready to run at 6 in the morning, but someone missed.

''Lieutenant Winters, where's Captain Sobel?'', that was the question everybody kept on asking him.

''He's on his way, Private'' he answered. Actually, he didn't know where Sobel was. He was not a latecomer, so it seemed all so weird.

Dick saw a jeep arriving and thought that their waiting had finally come to an end, but the car stopped he saw only Sergeant Evans on it who got out and made a sign to the driver to wait.

''Lieutenant Winters'' he said and saluted ''Captain Sobel has a briefing so it's your due to guide Easy Company in training today.''

Dick looked confused ''he didn't tell me he had a briefing.''

''It was decided at the last minute,sir'' Dick saluted the sergeant who got back to the car and drove away. He had to admit he had a bad feeling, but it was a sunny day, his men were particularly happy and Dick wouldn't have wasted the chance to train them without the Black Swan yelling into their ears.

''Come on, Easy! Let's get a move!''

''Yessir!'' the cried in return.

Sun rays heat their skin but nobody wanted to take a break. Dick had noticed how his men seemed to be carefree without Sobel around, but this didn't affect their training: actually, they seemed to run fast as the wind but Dick didn't see any drop of sweat falling from their foreheads. He noticed also how tight they were, and this was something that could have helped in combat. He was so proud of his men, and he knew they deeply trusted him.

They had just finished their morning running when Dick decided to give a break to Easy Company.

''Ok, ten minutes!''

''Yes sir!'' they replied.

Dick sat down under a tree. Sun was shining bright and he felt himself filled up by those rays. He looked at his men, patting each other on the back, or laughing. He chuckled in return: what a beautiful day it was. Still, there was something he could not understand: where the hell was Sobel? Two hours had passed and he didn't seem to come. That wasn't in him. He found himself thinking something was going on and maybe, the day they would've got in action had come. He felt himself trembling at the idea and, for the first time, he was not afraid. He looked at his men, so strong, so fierce, and thought he was as well. He had all the capacities to lead them. He had found strength.

''Sir, can I have a word with you?''

''Sure, Eugene.''

''Do you know why Captain Sobel missed our daily training, sir?''

''He had a briefing with Major Horton'' Dick replied. Eugene looked at him with wide-eyes and visibly confused.

''But sir…Major Horton is still in London, do you remember?''

A shiver runt through Dick's body. This bad feeling again. Why did Sergeant Evans lie to him? And where the hell was Captain Sobel?

''That's weird, Roe…''

Eugene seemed to be suddenly hit by something and swallowed hard before talking.

''Sir, I saw Sobel in the early morning, talking to Major Strayer. I didn't pay attention at all, but I think I've heard him saying ''this kind of behavior is unacceptable! He won't get away with it!''

Maybe Dick's sixth sense was right. Maybe something was going to happen, and soon. Clouds started to cover the sky and Dick found himself shaking. Fear invaded every cell of his body.

He got up. ''Ok Easy, let's get a move, it seems it's going to rain soon.''

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

He needed to talk to Nixon, and immediately. He was the Intelligence officer, he knew it for sure. His hands were sweating. He was nervously checking out every corner of the regiment to find him, finding himself irritated thinking Lewis had this special ability to always find him. When he finally got to find his friend, he noticed he was not alone: he stopped to gaze at her perfect body shape and he knew a smile was making its way on his lips. He reached the two losing his nervousness. He saluted them both, giving Bea a sweat smile that she returned.

''So…a bird told me Sobel didn't join your training today, right?'' asked Nixon, trying to break up the eye-flirting between the two, no knowing that it was the reason that made Dick's day a bad one.

''Yes...actually, I wanted to ask you if you may know why'' he asked, clearly jittery.

''No, Dick. Actually, I know he spent all the morning with Sink and Streyer, but I don't know what they discussed.'' Nixon noticed that something was troubling his friend.

''Dick, what…'' he didn't have time to ask what was crossing his friend's mind, since Sergeant Evans suddenly showed up.

''Captain Laurenti, Lieutenant Nixon, Lieutenant Winters: this is for you. With Captain Sobel's congratulations'' and after saluting, he got back to his jeep. Dick felt that shiver again. His trembling hands barely managed to open the letter.

''They misspelled court-martial'', Nixon said, trying to avoid his worries. Dick was still gazing at the letter when Bea took it away from his hands.

''Dammit, Dick! What the hell did you do?'' she almost cried.

''Me? Nothing! I…I don't know!'' Bea noticed how confused and scared he was. She could've bet he was close to tears so she decided to be the one to stay rational and to think of a solution.

''What do you want to do?''

''I didn't do anything, Bea! I won't accept a punishment for no reason!'' he said when anger was making its way, replacing fear ''I won't stand for it! I'm done with all his looks and tricks! You know what? He seeks for the fight, and I'm going to give it to him what he wants, as a real soldier.'' Bea could not believe his words. What was he thinking? That wasn't him. Dick left, saying that he needed to rest, to clear up his mind; Nixon was still thinking of a way to get his friend out of that situation and Bea knew what her role was too: she had to talk with Sobel.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

She didn't give him the time to tell her to come in.

''Why the hell you did it?''

''Did what, my dear?''

''What did Dick do, uh? She cried, visibly angry. Herbert gasped for air and sighed but suddenly, the image of his girl and Dick Winters kissing invaded his mind.

''He didn't fulfill my disposition. I can't let him get away with it.''

''But what the hell are you talking about? He did whatever you wanted him to do! He's Dick Winters, dammit!''

''I don't agree. I'm sure Lieutenant Winters understands what I'm doing is necessary and he will accept my punishment.''

''Oh, don't bet on it!'' she said, pointing her finger right to his nose ''because he accepted the court-martial, Herbert! Didn't you think of the consequences, uh?'' she cried at him. Sobel was speechless. He hadn't thought of the possibility Dick would've chosen the court-martial. His hands started trembling when he found out how this whole thing could've ended: Dick would've lost his position and he would've been alone in combat. Alone. He knew he could not handle it. He knew he would've needed Dick.

''I…listen, Bea, I must be sincere. I saw him kissing you and I blazed with jealousy! How could you do this to me?! With Dick!'' Bea was taken aback. So, he knew.

''I didn't know we were exclusive, Herbert! And is this an excuse to punish your best officer?''

''This hurts me, Bea ! And you know it!'' he nervously sat on his bed. Frustration took control of him. The girl he loved had kissed the man he hated the most, the man he knew was better than him.

''Listen, Sobel, it is not a good excuse. You know you need him. You're as fine as him, but you need him! So please, retire your accuse and everything will be alright'' she calmly said, sitting right by his said.

''Nuts!'' he exclaimed ''I'm a man and I will not give him what he wants! No discussion!''

''Fine! So I'll let you be alone with you your hatred, ok?'' she said visibly mad at him and furiously left his billet.

Bea could not help herself from thinking that Dick's troubles were due to her. _What a disaster I am!_ She thought. She would've punched herself. Dick could've lost everything he had worked for, everything that meant so much to him and, above all, his men would've lost him and they would've been entirely alone in combat. _What have I done?_ She burst crying loudly. She felt ashamed of herself: a whore, who had caused so many problems to a great man, and she didn't even have the strength to do something to amend. _What the hell am I doing here, if I cannot even be strong enough to solve the problems I have caused? I'm a girl, nothing else than a stupid girl playing with things bigger than me! _

''Bea…why are you crying?''

She raised her head to face the undefined figure who was talking to her. Dick.

''Oh Dick!'' and tears started falling profusely from her eyes while Dick sat right next to her and hug her.

''What's wrong, Bea? Please tell me, I can't see you crying.'' How tender he was ! She didn't deserve it ! If he only had known!

''Dick, I'm sorry, I'm such a mess, I'm such a disaster, I''

''What are you talking about? You're not a mess ! You're the most amazing woman I've ever met! ''

''No Dick!'' she sighed and tried to find the strength Dick thought she had. She had to do the right thing ''Sobel saw us, Dick! He saw us when we were kissing !'' Dick frozed. Dammit, that was a problem. The Regiment would've not expected such behavior from an officer, but he wondered why Sobel did find another excuse to punish him.

''But he said I failed to do my duties…why didn't he say nothing about the kiss?''

''Probably, because he wants to protect me, Dick. We…we see each other, sometimes.'' She lowered her head in embarrassment and felt Dick's look on her. At first, he was deeply confused and almost couldn't understand her words, but when he realized she was sincere, his disappointment could be perceived in his voice.

''How could you, Bea? With Sobel! I thought…I thought…you are better than that, Bea.'' He would've wanted to say ''I thought there was something between you and me'', but it was not about him, not at all. He felt like she had offended him, Lewis, and all Easy Company. He was right: she was better than that and she deserved surely someone better than Sobel.

''Better than who, Dick? Sobel? Do you think I'm better than him? Do you think _you_ are better than him? You don't know him like I do! And you know what? You don't know me neither ! ''

Dick was caught astonished by the fervor of her words.

''What do you mean by you don't know me? Yes, I don't know you completely, like you said once, no one can completely get to know one other, since there's so much hidden inside, but I do know that you could've had much better than that!''

''Who the hell do you think you are, Dick Winters? As far as I know, he's a Captain, and you're a Lieutenant! And I'm telling you this: Sobel can understand me better than anyone else, here!''

''Do you love him?'' Dick said, putting on a straight face, as if he only wanted to understand, trying to hide his trembling hands when the idea crossed his mind. Bea gasped for breath.

''I don't, but I need him.''

''Why?''

''Because he needs me, Dick'' she finally made her eyes which were about to be filled by tears with his deep blue ones ''he needs me, he's alone…and I feel useful when I'm with him. Nobody wants him, Dick, he's got no friends. I'm all his world. I'm unreplaceable for him.''

He got closer to her and pulled her into his arms. He felt her tears wetting his shirt and his own heart was about to break.

''You're unreplaceable for everyone here, Bea. Nobody does your job as you do, neither Lew. And we all care about you, we could not be able to survive without your advices, and your smiles and…'' _be a man, tell her _''you already know it, but if you hadn't told me all those things, I would've never got to live again. I felt already dead, Bea, and you know it! I've found the strength, and that's because of you! If I make it through this war, it will be because of everything you had told me! And I'm sure I'm going to need your words soon again, and I hope you'll be next to me. I need you too, Bea. I need you to survive.''

Those words should've helped her. Instead, she felt a rush of anger invading her heart and the words Sobel had spoken once about his Lieutenant echoed in her mind: _''Winters wants to take everything away from me: my rank, my company. He wants to be at the center of the universe, and under his false cover of an altar boy, there's a beast eager to devour everything I built to get fame. To be the best.''_ She realized Dick was as perfect as she thought and passion had control over him: he didn't want to win this war for you country, but for himself; he didn't want another CO for his company, he wanted to be the CO; he didn't want her because she was special, but because she belonged to someone else, and he could not stand it.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**Uppottery, June 6****th**

Fortunately, court-martial cleared Dick from Sobel's accuses and when Easy Company realized Colonel Sink had transferred their tyrannical CO, they all sighed of release. It was like they had already gunned down one of their enemies, and they were ready to get in the real combat under the leadership of a fine officer as Lieutenant Meehan. Dick liked him too. He was self-confident, but he would've accepted some suggestions by the other officers. He could read maps and men respected him. Sobel's ghost was far away from him, from his company and hopefully from Bea too. He knew she had lost her mind and he wondered how such a beautiful and smart woman could fall for a dreg like Sobel. He was right: Bea deserved something more than that, definitely. She was a hell of an officer. Dick didn't know what he wanted from her. Did he love her? No, but he had to admit he really needed her: he needed her smile, he needed her advices and her touch. He thought Bea liked him back. Although he had to think of the imminent mission, he could not help himself but thinking if he would've ever get the chance to get closer to her. He craved her touch. He felt chills running up his back every time she was close to him. He found himself having a selfish desire, the one he wanted to fulfil: one night, only one night with her. And he could've died in peace.

Everyone was scared and he noticed his men shitting themselves and literally, since there was an infinite queue for the toilettes. Obviously, he was scared to death too, but he tried to keep calm, confessing his fears to God and asking Him to guide his actions. Even if he still had his feet on the ground, he felt himself closer to the sky, his hopes and confidence growing and the love he felt for his men invaded him. He wanted to wish good luck to his best friend, who was still briefing the rest of the Intelligence officers. Nixon didn't seem to be particularly jittery; when Dick asked him how could he be so calm, he answered ''I'm the Intelligence officer, I know everything will be ok.'' Dick smiled at him and then, he started to search for her.

Bea was mentally repeating the mission and all the things all the Intelligence officers had discovered about the enemy. Maps were all she had in her mind, in that moment. She was totally absorbed in her thoughts that she didn't notice Dick Winters approaching to her. None of them knew what to do. Dick gently smiled at her and wished good luck. ''See you soon, Bea'', he said. ''See you soon, Dick'' she answered back. When he left, she found herself quivering, her mind could not think straight anymore. She knew she was acting childish, and God knew it wasn't the right moment to act in such way, but she knew she had two missions on her back: trying to get as many information she could about those Krauts, and making Dick Winters fall. He had to pay for what he had done. Everybody would've considered him so humble, so strong, so fucking perfect but she knew she could see the truth: Dick considered himself God: he was sure he would haven't made mistakes, he thought he was ironclad, unstoppable. But he forgot he was human, and humans fall, sometimes: she offered herself to remind Dick Winters he was a common mortal, just like the rest of the human kind. He had to fall, and she would've helped.

She got on her C-47, next to Lewis. When she knew they were about to take off, she felt Lewis' hand squeezing hers. She turned to her left to look at him: she saw confidence in his eyes, confidence and hope. She let her head leaning against Nixon's shoulder. She was ready. This whole thing could begin.


	6. Like the 4th of July

_Ok, it's the Dday! It's ''showtime'' for our soldiers. Just a PS: I didn't mean to be too gross so I'm sorry if you find some ''parts'' of the story too detailed. _

_Thank to the guest who left the last review ! You have no idea how glad I am that you like the story and...my English, too. Hahaha, as every time: enjoy!_

She closed her eyes trying to get some rest. Those airplane made a lot of noise. Nobody was talking. She took a long breath and looked down at her clock: the time had come. An official, a major, stood up when the light turned red.

''Stand up'' he yelled and as everyone obeyed his orders, their airplane started to tremble making everyone fall.

''They caught us!'' Nixon cried. Bea looked out through the tiny window: flashes and fire in the sky; she saw an airplane falling and found she wasn't so sorry at all. Somehow, they all managed to stand up and hook up and checked their equipment. They just needed the green light. Meanwhile, the massive C-47 was still trembling under the Nazi's fire but nothing had hit it yet. Weirdly, nobody was panicking, or they were just good at hiding their fear. Bea found herself thinking it was a sort of masterpiece: she could not see the land since the view she had offered only a sea made of grey clouds and aircrafts in fire. She was amazed. At that time, the light turned green. ''It's showtime'' she heard Nixon yelling, finding him excited rather than scared. She was the second to jump and her brain turned off: she didn't even think she was about to land among their enemies, ready to shoot at her. Everything seemed so slow-motioned while landing: she saw a house in fire, troops landing just like her invaded the sky. She thought she was going too slow: she was an easy target to shoot at and she found herself praying she could simply touch the ground as fast as she could so that she could hide and get away from that hell. Fortunately, she landed safely and freed herself of her chute. Another troop landed close by: it was Eugène Roe, Easy Company's medic.

''Captain Laurenti! It's so good to see you'' he whispered, keeping his head low while he was trying to cut his chute.

''Good to see you too, Doc.'' She smiled at him. Suddenly, something crossed her mind: she tried to figure out where his fellows were. Nobody landed near them.

''Eugène, where are your platoon's buddies are?''

''I have no idea Captain.''

Bea had to figure out where they were. Something didn't go according to the plans: everyone belonging to the same battalion had to land in the same place, but she could not see anyone else around. First of all, they had to find a secure place where she could check her map.

''Follow me, let's get away from this hell.''

They made their way through the woods. The sounds of the firing could still be heard, but Bea felt much more secure where they were.

''Stop, I need to check out my maps.'' She said to Eugène. She tried to recall the area where they had landed: there was a little church, the one which was on fire: she thought it might have been enough. Bingo. There it was: Saint Mere Eglise. Darn it.

''Bad news, Eugène'' she looked at him ''we're far away from our drop zone. We have to reach Saint Marie du Mont, where our battalion is located…well, at least, where it should be located.''

''Captain…I lost my equipment, I've got nothing but a knife.''

''Don't worry about it. Stay behind me, ok?''

Still, Bea could see something was troubling the medic.

''Your company is probably doing fine, Gène, don't worry.'' He smiled at her and started to follow her.

They didn't find any trouble in reaching the rest of the battalion staff but soon Bea figured out so many were still missing.

''Captain Laurenti! Nice to see you! We were sure we had lost you!'' Captain Hester said when he saw her.

''Well Clarence, it's good to know you have confidence in my abilities!'' she said wryly.

''Oh no Bea, don't get me wrong. Just a little bunch of the headquarters Company. Strayer has just arrived. I sent Nixon to conduct a reconnaissance of the village here.''

She was obviously relieved to hear Lewis made it.'' What about the other companies?''

''As I said, so many troops are still missing. There's a little group from D Company, E and F. I personally sent Lieutenant Winters and what's left of his company to take care of the machine gun along the hedgerow which is firing against Utah beach. Lieutenant Winters assumed temporally command of Easy Company, since Lieutenant Meehan and his men haven't show up yet.''

Bea found out the success of the invasion was still a doubt. She joined the rest of the battalion staff and discussed the whole situation with them: she was informed of the men who were missing, the Germans' counterattack and so on. Three hours had passed when Lieutenant Nixon came back sat on a tank with Lieutenant Winters. The tank stopped right in front of her and they got down.

''How was your day, Bea?'' Nixon asked wryly.

''How can I say it: on fire!'' she answered. Lewis chuckled and then hugged her.

''I thought I had lost you, don't do this to me once again ok?'' he said.

''You know I could not get by without you?'' she said back. Since they were getting to mushy, they broke their hug and smiled at each other. She found herself oddly happy to see Lewis. On her way prior to reaching the Battalion, she noticed troops shot in the night sky or their bodies on the trees. She knew a lot of good men had lost their lives.

''Where the hell is Dick?'' she answered, since he disappeared during their long hug.

''I don't know, maybe he's trying to find so peace. He lost a man during the assault.''

''Right, the assault…how did it go?''

''Easy and Dog made a great job, everything's alright. They lost a private from A Company, Easy has two wounded.''

''Ok, not bad.''

''Well…yes. Dick found some useful maps so tomorrow morning, as first thing, we're going to check them out. Now, take some rest, ok?'' he smiled at her and got away to find some peace himself. Sure she wanted to sleep some hours but first, she wanted to check Dick. Thomas Meehan was still missing so Dick was the new Easy's commander. Obviously, the idea of Dick getting the place of Sobel troubled her. Simply, it was not fair: he was getting everything he wanted. Still, she had the feeling that Dick had something troubling himself too, and if it was so, she could not miss the chance to see the divine Richard Winters having some problems.

She found him all by himself: he was staring at somewhere far from them, where the Germans were still fire some machine gun.

''Better than the 4th of July, don't you think?''

He turned to see her but said nothing. She was hit by bloodshot eyes. She went next to him and sat down.

''How are you doing, Dick?''

''Lieutenant Meehan is missing. I'm now Easy's new commander officer. ''

''I know. Well, lucky you.''

''Lucky, right.'' He didn't seem to be so happy at all.

''Was Meehan a friend of yours?''

''It's not this, Bea. It's…I'm now directly responsible of those men's lives! I'm only 26 years old and fighting this war is still a big deal to me. Now, they tell me it's my responsibility to guide those men into fight. And I know that more than someone will die during this war, and I will be the one to blame for every death and wound!''

She could definitely see that he was in panic. She knew he had lost a man during his assault and that first death under his command and that now he was probably thinking it was his fault. Hatred did not make its way in her heart: she temporally forgot about what he had done to her friend and lover, and hugged him close.

''Dick, it's war: people die and you're not to blame. Don't ever think about that. You're a fine officer, and you will do a great job.'' Sure she thought he was a good officer but she didn't want to enlarge his ego. Still, those words escaped her lips. While she still had her arms wrapped around him, she thought her personal war against Dick Winters was a waste of time. She had always known she envied Dick's capacities and personality and that hatred which had taken over her was just a childish expression of envy for him.

''From my mistakes their lives will depend. I'm not perfect. I…''

''Dick, stop it ok? You're right! No one is perfect, nor are you! But, you know what? I noticed you were never caught up doing any infraction and your superior adore you. You're already the United Army's shining star although you finally got the chance to show your real talent today. '' She noticed a smile appeared on his face.

''I made an infraction, even two, you know.'' He chuckled at her, so she knew what he was talking about.

''Well, nobody know. Just the two of us. And…Nixon, but it's ok.''

''You know, I think I could use an infraction now.'' He sweetly looked at her. Bea didn't exactly know why, but she needed that kiss so she was the first to lean on him. As their mouths sealed, they knew they created a glimpse of paradise with their tongues which were caressing each other. She felt his hand on her back and chills running up her back. As the time was passing by, the kiss became more intense: now their tongues were teasing and she knew she was like a bomb, ready to explode.

As she parted, still gasping for air she said ''you're nervous, Dick, maybe you may need some tension release'' was what came out of her lips. She wasn't sure he had understood, but when she was him getting up she knew their time had come; as that day Lewis said: it was the showtime.

They made their way into an abandoned house. As they entered, she was already in his arms, her lips against his. They reached for the only armchair there was. Now that she was was sat on him, she knew everything was about to happen. She broke their never-ending kiss to look at him: she wanted to see how he would've looked like under her touch. Her hands were making their way to his belt as Dick had a flashback of a night, in the middle of a street, when a young and beautiful woman was doing the same thing and he didn't let his desire take over him. But that night, he would've gone all the way: he deserved it.

She wanted to take it easy, enjoying every minute of that moment. She knew she was giving him hell, since she was still roaming on his underwear and not giving him what he wanted. His eyes were thirsty, telling ''please, don't torture me so'' and she liked it. That need to be essential was making its way in her mind, since now Dick Winters needed her. What a sensation it was ! Lustful, he craved for her body . She decided it was the time to have the situation in hand, literally. She found her way to…dick. That thought made her chuckle, visibly, but he could not mind less. She started to caress all his long length, still giving the Lieutenant; when she started to focus her attention to his glans, he had made a movement with all his body that was about to make her fall from him. A loud groan escaped from his mouth and she felt amply satisfied. When she begun stroking, Dick tried to fight the need to close his eyes, since he wanted to enjoy the show: a ''I've got power on you'' expression was stuck on her face as he looked at her before gazing at her hands still working on him. That felt the best sensation in the world. As he felt her strokes becoming even more intense and fast, he knew he could not be able to stand it for too long. In return, his groans, his lustful and satisfied look turned her on. Although he tried to bite hard his lips in order to avoid any odd noise, he could not help but panting loudly when he came, for what it seemed to be a lifetime.

''Darn it, hope there's a towel around here'' she said, when he finally finished. He started to breathe normally again when he pulled her close to his chest; her hair scent invaded his nose.

''Dick, it's quiet weird being romantically embraced while your cock out of your pants, my hand still…dirty, you know?''

''Well…maybe you should find a way to get rid of that…dirt'' he chuckled.

''Funny you…well, my uniform is dirty as well. I don't know I will explain this if I meet someone.''

''Shut up'' he said, and he kissed her. At the beginning, it was a fierce one, and the result of what they had shared; then, it turned out to be slow, intense but sweat and tender. Their tongues broke as he started to give her tender small kisses on her lips and nose.

''Dick…maybe we should…you know, collect ourselves and get out of here. Someone may see us, or enter here…''

''Yes, you've got a point.'' She got up and cleaned her hand on a curtain, while he was fasten his belt again.

''Uhm..wait'' he said, and she turned to face him ''don't you wanna…be…ok, let's do this again. How about you? I mean, shouldn't I…give pleasure to you, too?''

''Oh Dick, you look like a school boy at his first experience! Don't think about it now'' she paused and then added ''we've still got time.''


	7. Vulnerable

_I'm soooo sorry I'm so late but I had so many things to do for University...I humbly apologize and I hope to fix everything giving you this looong chapter. Hope you'll enjoy ! :)_

They exchanged an intense look full of meanings: lust, satisfaction, fear and a tad of confusion, but all these emotions were bounded by confusion. None of them knew what to do or what to say the moment their brief but intense contact ended. Bea, still on the top of him, looked instinctively down in embarrassment, which grew even more when she figured out he was still all out. She chuckled nervously while Dick was still recovering. His throat was still burning as result of trying to suppress the growls of pleasure; his hands were still quivering and forceless just like his legs; he could've bet his fatter cow that his cheek were red like the fire. Describing the feeling that came along with that was hard to him. He didn't know if he just and simply needed a woman's touch or _her _touch, but a part of him suggested he would've refused any other woman, especially after the day he had passed and the things he had seen. Anyway, it felt great. He could literally feel his blood rushing through his body, his blue eyes melting under her impassionate glance. When he knew he had lost all his forces, he just closed his eyes and instinctively opened his mouth a little and simply enjoyed the feeling. Sometimes, he would've forced himself to open his eyes, looking at her, at what she was doing to him and how secure she seemed to be. He could read in her eyes his same burning desire, which made him even more turned up than he was. He asked her for a kiss, twice or three times to suppress the growls, still trying to make their way through his throat: passionate and wet kisses. Now, the burning passion was leaving its place to comfort, when he noticed how Bea was…embarrassed?

He looked tenderly at her and asked ''hey, is everything alright?''

She looked blatantly awkward but she tried to hide it ''uhmm…No, no, everything alright'' she answered back trying to convince him.

''Really? You look ill at ease…which is, uhmm, I think it is justifiable…'' he tried to reassure her.

''No, no…I'm just…tired'' _liar _''I'm tired. It was a long day and I have a briefing tomorrow morning, I think I'd better get some sleep.''

Ok, she didn't want to talk about it, which was understandable, but Dick had to admit he wanted her to stay just a little more with him, just to talk about what all this could mean to them. But she didn't want to talk.

She sheepishly chuckled at him and finally get up. She tried to collect herself as better as she could, said goodnight to her friend and made her way to the door. Before she could be completely out, she turned back.

''Hey Dick?''

''Uhm?''

''You're going to be a great commander. Have some rest'' and disappeared in the night, the weirdest night Dick had ever had in his whole life, and still the one and only that gave to him so many emotions.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

He could barely believe he survived Day of Days. His Commanding Officer, Lieutenant Meehan, was lost somewhere with the his entire platoon, and down at the battalion thought they were all dead, which was not simply a guess: Dick saw so many aircraft fall that night, burning in flames; he could only hope his Lieutenant and men did not suffer too much. Now, he was the only First Lieutenant in E Company, and that meant he was the new Company's CO. His baptism as leader measured up to his personal standards and, at the same time, he was so proud of his men. He had lost a man that night, the first of probably a long series he thought, and he didn't know if he could stand it. How could a farm boy, who belonged to a Mennonite background, handle all that? He had to. Sun was about to rise. The day coming would be as tough as the one he had passed. He closed his eyes, trying to catch some sleep, effortlessly. Discouraged, he gave a look to Lieutenant Harry who was sleeping on his right; he could see Buck Compton sleeping candidly as a child in the bed right in front of his. The bed on his left was empty: it was Lewis'. His best friend, he thought, would never participate to a crossing fire, but this didn't make his task safer. Nix had to renounce to his dear sleep and to get into the enemy's lines before everyone else to get to know how things were going to the Krauts. He wondered if they had already met, Bea and Lewis; maybe she would've told him what happened, and Lewis would've put him under sixth grade as soon as he could. There was a time, when he was attending College, when he had had a girlfriend: her name was Eliza, she was petite, fair skin, red cheeks and brown long hair in contrast with her bright green eyes. Their story was innocent: they could not spend a lot of time together, because of their studies, but he remember borrowing his roommate's car on Saturday to pick her out; they saw a movie, had dinner out and when it was 11.30 p.m. , he saw her home and kissed her goodnight, sweetly. Did he love her? Probably not, but he liked the way things were with her. Another woman was in his life, but Bea was totally different from his last sweetheart. That gold, blond hair made her look like a lioness; her small and red lips usually drew a sly smile. Above all, he adored her icy eyes that attracted him so much and, at the same time, made him scared. She was not a woman. Nor a man. Simply, she was programmed like a robot to apply all the things she learnt at the College. Fierce like a lion, cold as the snow, she had their relationship in her hands, or whatever the thing they had it was. How could he define her now? His lover? Girlfriend? Just friends? He remembered once again the time he shared with Eliza, where everything had a name, a definition, a place, a time; he knew exactly what he had to do to be a good boyfriend, and Eliza did too. Things were not so simply with Bea: she gave everyone the impression to be secure, strong, and everyone thought she could've been a great general. Everyone knew she had her small but solid world of securities, and she was incapable of errors: instinct and reason perfectly coexisted in her mind and this was what made her a great Intelligence Officer, and a great person too. Nevertheless, she had made a fall. They didn't really talk about it, but Dick often wondered what made her fall into Sobel's arms. Sobel! Sobel. How bad, he was. Dick wondered if he was guided by exceptional leadership skills or luck during the Assault at Brecourt Manor. He wondered if there was something in Sobel that Bea loved, those kind of things that in her opinion made a boy a man. Flashbacks to the night spent with her, in the middle of the street, brought his mind to what she had said that night: Dionysian. _''Destructive power. The Overman embraces his destiny, destroys, gives space to his passions._'' He had killed, that day, he had destroyed lives. He had given space to his passion. Being an Overman was the only way to conquer her heart? Maybe Sobel was. He regretted the time when good manners and some flowers were enough to make a girl happy. Above all, he missed the time when everything was pure, innocent, but he knew that innocence was an absurd concept during a war. He had to get used to violence and vulgarity since the only thing the world they were living in knew was destruction, a clear expression of an animal instinct repressed for too long.

Clearly unable to catch some sleep, he decided to get up to have a walk.

''Ouch!'' he cried, awaking Harry while Buck was still under his covers.

''What?! Who?! When?!'' asked an alarmed Harry Welsh.

''Ouch…nothing…I hit the bed, sorry Harry'' Dick said back to his friend, still trying to suppress involuntary curses.

''Where the hell are you going at this hour of the night for Pete's sake!''

''I can't sleep, I think I'm going out for a walk.''

''Ok do whatever you want'' Harry said, clearly upset ''and pay attention at least.''

Yes, Dick: you should pay attention.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

In the early morning, Bea briefed the whole second battalion to their next mission in program, and Lewis did the same with Easy company's officers. Carentan was a crucial point to the Allied's advance and it would've linked all the other divisions. Intelligence knew German paratroopers were holding the town, but had no idea about the real number of soldiers they would've met.

Reaching Carentan was a big deal. In the night, companies or even platoons lost contact among each other. For this reason, Lewis and Bea kept controlling all the 2nd battalion's companies to assure they were all united. Bea and Dick gazes' had met only a few time. He smiled tenderly at her while she answer back with a chuckle that meant ''I'm here with you, but don't try to talk to me''. There was no time to think about it. Dick was pumped and scared since he would've guided his company into fight as a commander. He talked to Nix, in order to have an idea of what the battlefield would've looked like so that he could start to think how to take advantage out of it.

''The first thing you're going to see is Café de Normandie'' Nix said ''but before Easy enters into the town, there's a field with no protection.''

''So we have to move fast.''

''Yes, I guess'' Nix said, and noticing the look on his friend's face he knew Dick had already an idea ''what are you going to do?''

''I guess I'll send Harry with first platoon ahead while a base of fire from our lines will cover it in the case Germans notice us. Then I'll follow with the second and third. ''

''This is going to be easy, trust me. We've studied Carentan's maps: once you get into the town, you're going to have a lot of protection.''

''Protection. Protections may mean death, too.''

''Dammit Dick! Think positive !''

He couldn't. he had to be realistic. Everything may be a danger in war. A building, that should offer cover to his soldiers, maybe be hit and it could turn out to be a mortal trap. He knew he had a job to do, he knew his men accepted his same task and knew about the risks when they entered the army; nevertheless, Dick wished he could avoid as many deaths and wounded as possible.

They didn't find a lot of resistance in their way to Carentan. They reached the town in the morning, and took cover for a while so that they could elaborate a plan. Dick confirmed the one he had explained to Lewis and sent Harry and first platoon ahead.

''Move fast. This is the key.''

Harry nodded and made sign to his men to move. The moment they had almost reached the town, a sniper started to shoot at them. First platoon managed to reach the town and took cover, but they could not attack without the other platoons that didn't dare to move.

''For Christ's sake Winters, make them move!'' Lieutenant Colonel Streyer yelled.

''Move, move! Buck! Make them move! Get out of here! Our men are dying ! Move, Move! '' Dick was shouting to his men but none of them listened to their CO. Dick was even stronger, blazing with anger and fear for the first platoon. Now he was exposed to the snipers, standing with no cover, trying to get his men out of the foxholes, kicking their asses and screaming. Everyone was astonished, since nobody believed that shy and temperate Lieutenant Winters capable of such fervor. Finally, they went down the hill and reached their buddies.

From the top of the hill where Streyer, Nixon and Laurenti were, they were able to check the whole situation down the town: their men were doing great but they noticed there some men down.

''Let's go'' Streyer said ''we're going to help the losses.''

Being so close to action made Bea's adrenaline pump in her veins as much as in the other soldiers. What a great Company Sobel had built: fast as the wind, they moved together as an unique war machine. They were doing a great job. Then , they heard a deafening hiss, and a man yelling '' They got us! Spread it out ! Spread it out!'' and Bea felt panic take over her. Their men were now on the run, trying to get away from the town they had courageously taken. But the number of losses kept growing, and Bea thought she was in hell. They managed to take as many wounded as possible.

Dick was standing in the middle of the street, checking the maps, when Colonel asked if it was safe to cross so that they could bring the wounded away. Dick gave him a questioning look. _I'm in the middle of a street, completely at ease: what do you think?''_

''Yes sir'' he only answered. Streyer, Bea and other men made their way out, carrying the wounded while Nixon gave Dick a knowing look. In the moment Lewis left him alone, Dick was hit by a sniper in the ankle.

_This is comic _he thought. _Stupid, pay attention ! _

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

It was just a ricochet; that's what Doc Roe said. It was nothing at all, but he felt his leg sore and stiff and could not walk properly. When Eugene extracted that small, almost invisible, piece of metal out of his ankle, he thought humans' lives are so weak. He felt so vulnerable for a moment. Then he noticed something queer.

''Hey, what's up with Blithe?''

Eugene turned around to look at him for a moment. ''Nuttin, except he can't see.''

''He can't see?''

''So he said.''

Dick nodded at Eugene, then tried to get up to reach his man. No, he could not really walk, and this made him feel so useless. Trying to sit right in front of Blithe was a big effort.

Blithe was blind. How could it be possible? He said he didn't know, he said it was all white. Dick noticed a tear falling from his wide open, but ill, eyes. He tried to reassure him, since Blithe didn't want to let anyone down, and Dick could not trust what he had heard: this man, this boy, came from the other part of the world was now blind; maybe he would've never got to see again a beautiful sunset, or the smile of a woman, and he was not concerned about that; no, he _didn't want to let anyone down. _He was _sorry._ Dick felt the urge to make him feel that he was there for him. He put a hand on his shoulder, speaking to him reassuring words, calling him ''son'' and, at last, giving him a smile that Blithe could not see. When he managed to get up, putting all his forces in that insignificant action, he heard Blithe's trembling voice calling his name.

''Sir, thank you, I'm alright'' and Dick watched him getting up. He was now able to see again. Dick and Eugene exchanged a questioning look, and Dick figured out that all that Blithe needed was just someone to be close to him.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The door of the aid station opened and Bea got in.

''Hello Doc!''

''Hello, Captain. Do you need something?''

''Uhm, no, I was just looking for our bad off Lieutenant.''

''He's in the room on the right, helping me with the wounded.''

''Thank you, Eugene.'' She chuckled at him and made her way to the room where Dick was. What she found inside, was a man collapsed all alone on the dirty ground, one of his ankle boot missing.

''Here you are. How's our reckless Lieutenant ?'' she said wryly.

Dick snorted. ''Reckless? It was a stupid action of mine, standing in that way in the middle of a street during a crossing fire.''

She noticed how frustrated he was. ''Hey, it's ok. You could not foresee everything, you know? Anyway, you and your men did a great job today.''

''Did I? The number of wounded in the other room makes me think I was not so great.''

She sat right next to him and put her hand on his shoulder, cuddling him. '' As I said before, you can't foresee everything, nor can you prevent the men to get killed or wounded. You're just a man, Dick, a man trying to do his best, and you did.''

_A man. _A man was not good enough. The Army didn't want a man, they needed a capable, brave and wise Officer; Bea didn't want a man, she needed a…

_Dionysian. Destroy. Conquer. Conquer. Conquer lands, conquer hearts._ He turned to see her: she looked so human now, trying to take care of him. Tenderness and concern in her eyes, and he could've bet he had never seen them in that way before. She was vulnerable too, just like he was. His skin could be hit by a ricochet, his heart could melt under hey gaze, his body could burn under her touch. _The Overman embraces his destiny_. Dick knew his destiny was being hit by a lot of things, or people. And he could embrace it.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Dick knew they had to expect the Krauts to make a move. Carentan was important also to them. They were attacked in the middle of the afternoon and luckily found cover behind the woods. When the night came, they could hear the Germans singing in their zone, while they were all quiet and covered. Dick checked the men, but he felt so tired dragging his heavy body on one leg only and decided to head back to his foxhole. An helmet was visible.

''Nix?''

''He went checking out the line. Said he could not sleep. I've got to say your foxhole is more comfortable than mine'' the helmet turned around, and Dick was able to catch her face. He slipped into the foxhole, close to her.

''So, how are the men doing?''

''Fine. We're moving at 05.30.''

''Ok. And how are you doing?''

'' It hurts. A lot.''

''You'll be fine. It's nothing. ''

They stayed in silence for some minutes, then Bea turned around and met Dick's eyes.

''You got me'' Dick said chuckling.

''What does it mean?''

''I mean, you got me as the sniper who made this to me did. You make me feel so small, and invisible, as a single move of yours could literally shoot me down. At the same time, I feel so strong, because I manage to survive, to resist. And to keep fighting.''

''You're fighting me?''

''With all my forces. Although you make it quite impossible sometimes'' he chuckled.

She made her hand slip on his thigh and she grabbed it tight. He didn't know what could've happened. Stroking his thigh, she got closer to his face and started to kiss his cheeks, his lips and then started biting his ear, a gesture that brought Dick's mind back to their very first physical contact. She blew into his ear sending shivers all along his body, now ready to burn. He knew it was not the right place, but he couldn't stop her.

''So…I have control over you, haven't I?'' she softly whispered in his ear. He growled in return.

''Say it'' she now ordered.

''You have control over me'' he managed to say, and she chuckled impishly.

''Oh, but I already knew it, you know? And you know why?'' she paused, waiting for his answer which didn't come.

'' I'll tell you why: because you're a Lieutenant, and I'm your Captain.''

A laugh escaped from his lips _''_so, is this the game you want to play?''

She chuckled, but didn't answer. She pulled her hand away from his leg and tried to catch some sleep.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Germans attacked prior to them. When Fox and Dog retired Bea and Nixon thought the end had come but when the Shermans came to help, they knew they had won that one too. Losses kept growing, but they finally got retired from the front and a dream called England, where hot food and showers were waiting for them, was a great price for what they got into during those first days of fighting.


	8. The perfect night

**Here we are again! I took my time to write this chapter, which is a pretty long one and I'll tell you why: this is a ''bridge'' chapter, which should introduce you to the next level of Bea and Dick's story. I think I may publish the next chapter very soon, in 2 or 3 days, since I have already the story in my mind. Anyway, writing this one was a tough challenge and I don't know If I succeded in giving an idea how what may happen next. Anyway, I hope you like it and that you'll be eager to read the next chapters too, since I'm so so excited about it ! Well...here it is.**

They spent all the summer on the edge, trying to enjoy the life away from the front lines, and all the comforts that came along with it: showers, hot food, long sleeps. By the way, training was the order of the day: during their time in England, replacements joined the company and they had to get familiar with the rest of the men. The new entries were everything but men, or soldiers, and looked at the veterans as if they were gods. The men of Camp Toccoa took care of their boys, especially the NCOs, but they were reluctant at the idea of getting to close to the replacements since they knew that they would've been the first to fall.

Dick got back to the Barnes', and God knew how happy he was about that. They became his second family, and moreover, he had the chance to make up his mind about a lot of things: leadership and Bea, especially. He got promoted, he was a Captain and Commanding Officer of Easy Company, so now he had the same Bea's rank. During those months, they had the chance to spend some time alone and to enjoy other moments of stolen passion, or it would be better to say _Dick_ got the chance to enjoy some moments of passion. _''We have time_'', she said. Dick started to have enough, and wondered why she forced him to loosen up, whereas she was still so frigid. Dick could not deny it anymore: he wanted more. Sometimes, his hands tried to wander under her shirt, a move that she stopped every time; _''I'm not like you, Dick. I could be noisy, sometimes. And we can't risk, can we?_''. Anyway, sometimes he found himself thinking of what all that could lead to. There was passion, he wished there was even more but sometimes he wondered what _more _meant. Everytime they had the chance to be alone it was different, more intense. Dick didn't know if it were desire or his feelings for her were growing. When things got heated, Dick could not help but thinking how hot she was, but in other situations, he found himself contemplating how _beautiful _she was, how grace could be found in every move she made. Dick tried to wash away those thoughts: it was not the moment to get serious about something but the war. ''_We have time_''. They could not bring their _whatever-it-was _to such level, they had to keep their minds on what they were doing there. And what would have the men thought if they had got to know what was happening between them? He had to admit they were good at it, at hiding what they were sharing. Obviously, only Lewis Nixon had the honor to know, but he didn't count since he knew everything. Actually, Dick didn't think Lewis got to know what was happening so soon since he had never put him under his sixth grade till one night, when they were already in England.

''_Who's your favorite Intelligence Officer?''_

_Dick looked at him with a questioning look ''what should that even mean, Lew? ''_

''_Who's your favorite one? Bea or me? ''_

''_Are you drunk?''_

_Dick could not believe his eyes: Lewis Nixon put on a child face, pursing his lips ''you think she's better than me!''_

''_That's not true Lew, why'd you say that?''_

''_You spend a lot of time with her and since you can't have those kind of feelings for a woman I guess you discuss maps, plans and so on!'' Lewis stated clearly offended. _

_Oh, Nixon. He knew._

''_What do you mean by ''you can't have those kind of feelings for a woman''?''_

''_What I said, Dick'' Lewis answered with a smile that said it all. ''Here's Saint Richard, and he would never out his eyes, or hands, on a lady while he's in charge! What kind of example could he set for his men!''_

''_This doesn't mean I haven't got eyes to look, or that I don't appreciate a beautiful woman.''_

''_Oh, so you appreciate it, spending time with her.'' Lewis gave him a satisfied look which silently said ''that's what I wanted to hear''._

''_Yes, Lew, I do. So what?''_

''_And…haven't you ever made a move on her?''_

_Dick snorted, clearly upset by his friend. Dick knew what Lewis wanted to hear, but he didn't want to discuss it. Nevertheless, Lewis would've never quitted it if he hadn't got to know what he wanted. _

''_We kissed, and you know it.''_

''_Yes, I do. Has it ever happened again?''_

''_Yes, Lewis, it has happened other times.''_

''_How many?'' _

''_I don't count them, Lewis. Many times, I guess.''_

_Lewis was now impishly smiling at his friend ''And…is it all? Nothing more than a kiss?''_

_Dick could not help himself from smiling, a smile he suppressed the moment he figured out he offered Lewis what he wanted. ''Oh oh, tell me! I wanna know!''_

''_There's nothing to tell, Lewis. Personal affairs.''_

''_Is she good?''_

''_Lewis!''_

''_Oh, c'mon! I've waited a lifetime to have a conversation like this with my best friend!''_

''_Well, I don't want to share my intimate relation with you.''_

''_Oh, oh!'' Lewis exclaimed, as if he were proud of something he did, filling his empty glass with some more Vat69 ''but just a question, my friend: how did you manage to…you know, women are loud, and I can't see a place where you two could be alone so…how did you manage to get laid?''_

_Dick thought it could go worse, and decided it was a question he could answer to '' She doesn't make a sound, and movements are not so necessary. Finding a place is a big deal so…''_

''_What the hell are you telling me? Unnecessary movements? Dick, do you want me to give you a lesson about how to have sex?''_

_Ouch._

''_Actually…we don't do…those…things'' Dick answered in embarrassment. Now Lew was losing the thread of the conversation._

''_Wait…wait. So, what d'you mean by ''intimate relation'' ?''_

_Dick was ill at ease with those kind of questions. A farm boy with a Mennonite background could not discuss sexual practices and being totally comfortable with it._

''_It means that I don't make a move. I just…enjoy. Please, stop it!''_

''_Ohhhh…so you don't...Oh, just like teenagers at the high school ! How sweet you are!'' Lewis said wryly and burst in laughs. He could not believe it: his friend, a man, an officer, was a novice with women ! Dick was blatantly embarrassed and frustrated, and Lewis noticed it and tried to collect himself. _

''_Tell me…'' he said after clearing his voice ''why don't you...''_

''_I don't know, don't ask'' Dick interrupted. _

_Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx_

Time for action finally came. Operation Market-Garden was the largest airborne drop of the war, even larger than the D-day's one. They were attached to the British Army's since the plan was Montgomery's. Lewis and Bea briefed the second battalion as usual, while Dick briefed his company. He also announce if the plan went right, they would come back home for Christmas, but nobody believed it.

Dick was visibly worried about the replacements. That would've been their first drop, their first fight and they were only kids. He had trained them but he was sure they would've been wounded, or worst. Dick talked to the rest of the Toccoa's men.

''_I'm not asking you should behave like parents with their kids, but…watch out for them. Give them some tips; in the end, they're now part of our company, just like you are, and we're all brothers here.''_

They were all clearly concerned and really felt like fathers with their kids. What Dick saw the day of their drop didn't make things easier: most of them didn't even know how to hold a rifle; he warned the NCOs once again, _''watch out''_, and said a little prayer.

Luckily, everything went how it had to go. They didn't find much resistance during their drop. They had to reach Eindhoven, which was a bit far away from their drop zone and they had to cross a field where cover was inexistent. Guard on, they advanced. A Lieutenant was shot, and Dick tried to cover his grade, since he knew that CO were a perfect target for snipers. Bea and Lewis watched out for the whole 2nd Battalion. When they entered Eindhoven, Dick couldn't believe his eyes: orange flags everywhere, locals singing, and dancing, and welcoming the American saviors. Dick decided to let his men enjoy that gratitude that they fully deserved for a little while. In the meantime, he kept his eyes wide open to individuate any trace of snipers. Again, he covered his rank, trying to look as a normal GI, and also erased his grade from his helmet.

''Dick'' he heard Lew calling, approaching to him with Bea.

''Yeah.''

''Clock's ticking.''

''I think we should…'' Bea was interrupted, since the man she was talking to was too busy to kiss a local woman. A short, fast kiss that weirdly left her speechless. Dick didn't even care about it, just said ''thank you''. He knew she was looking, but he didn't seem to be concerned about Bea's reaction. Bea tried to collect herself, washing away those inexplicable emotions that she hated so much. Jealousy was just for weak.

''We've got to get to the bridges'' Dick said to Lewis.

They tried to make their way through the crowd. Lewis had already met a man who worked for the local Resistance against German and he said he would've helped. Dick and Bea exchanged a fast look, and he noticed something was wrong with her.

''Captain, are you ok?''

''Uhm…yes, just a bit flushed. I don't like crowded places.''

He sweetly smiled at her and reached Lewis.

''So, where's our man?''

''I don't know, just wait here, I'm gonna find him.''

Dick nodded and saw his friend disappearing in the crowd. The locals were singing a song, really catchy, and Dick could only imagine what was about. His men were blatantly happy to be already considered as heroes, being welcomed in such way. He saw them dancing, taking photographs and shaking hands. He smiled at the view, and felt himself doing something great for these people. With their help, they would've been finally free from the German's oppression; his doubts disappeared at the thought, and felt a bit stronger and secure. Meanwhile, a small group gathered and was screaming against something, or someone, Dick couldn't tell; then, a gap opened among the crowd, and they could see what was happening: some women were down their knees, crying, and some men were shaving their heads. Bea thought she was about to cry as well; she knew the reason for that treatment and, in any case, she knew those women didn't deserve that publish humiliation. Nobody deserves to be treated such way, and she felt a growing hatred growing in her body. Dick noticed how concerned Bea looked, who was just next to him, and gave her a concerned look as well.

''Hey, it's all ok?''

''I…I…It's ok, don't worry'' she chuckled at him, trying to reassure him; Dick noticed she started trembling and wished he could talk to her, but Lewis arrived with this tall, blond man who stated he could help them to get the bridges, that he knew where the Germans were, and that his squad would've told them when the British Army arrived. Dick looked down at a member who his squad: a kid. The man said they've always done a great job; that was not what really troubled Dick, but he didn't want to keep up the conversation. He said to the man, said he accepted his help, and tried to get away from that place. There was something completely wrong with those people. They had suffered for years, Dick thought, and sufferance made them so inhuman. You don't punish the pain you've suffered with other pain, Dick thought.

''_Let's get away from here'' _he whispered to Lewis. Bea looked relieved as well.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The night was perfect, too perfect to sleep inside. Ok, actually it was a bit cold, more than a bit, but Bea didn't care; she needed some time to be alone with herself, and knew nobody would've looked for her or even found her, there, in that field, staring at ceiling. It was too good to believe it: stars shone bright like diamonds, there were no clouds in the sky, and that wind that was freezing her bones didn't feel so cold at all. Bea inhaled heavily, to smell the grass scent. She had some things troubling her mind. First, the view of those women, that shocked her all the way. She could not believe her eyes: those people had suffered for such a long time, they knew what pain was, and still they felt the right to cause it to someone else. How cruel people could be. Then, there was a selfish thought that crossed her mind, and even though she thought that brainstorming about the new day's plan was more important, she could not help herself from thinking of Dick Winters. That kiss was still troubling her, and she didn't know why; actually, she didn't want to admit to herself the true reason. Bea knew the moment would've come. Dick Winters was way too perfect to not fall in love with. But what she truly loved about him was the way he looked at her: so sweet, so tender, so careful. Sometimes, she had the feeling that he loved her back and felt the same way, because she could not explain herself why he would look at her in such a way. She knew it was a look he gave only to her. Then there was the way he touched her: it was passionate, lustful, but his touch was also so gentle and she felt so fulfilled every time his hand caressed her skin. She simply melt at the touch, and she knew it was not all about the attraction she felt for him. So yes, that kiss hurt her, a lot. How could he do it? And moreover, he knew Bea was around. Did he want to hurt her purposely ? Did he want to demonstrate she was meaningless to him? That she was just fun? A tear came down her eyes: she didn't want to be just fun to Dick Winters, and that was hard to admit.

''hey, I've been looking for you! Why are you spending the night out?''

Bea turned to face him. Angst took over her. She was so mad at Dick Winters, and her eyes said it all.

''are you alright?''

''Yes, I'm fine, thank you for asking'' she said roughly.

Dick sat down next to her and tried to tangle his hand with Bea's, but she moved away.

''I don't think so, just tell me what's wrong.''

''Just because I don't want to share romantic moments with you ? ''

''Yeah'' he answered directly. Bea wasn't in the mood to keep such a conversation, especially with him. She had so many things to clear up. She merely hoped he would've understood and disappeared in the night. But he didn't want to understand. He laid down, next to her, embracing her fully. Feeling his body against hers made her want to lean even more into him. She wished she was one of those girls who could simply enjoy a moment of tenderness, but she could not help but thinking, and she wondered if Dick felt something for her.

''You don't have to talk'' he whispered in her ear ''I'll take care of you. You don't have to worry about anything. I'm here with you''. Bea froze at such words, which seemed so true, and made her feel so protected like she had never been. She smiled at him, and Dick knew he had found a light inside of her, so he decided to take advantage of the moment and kissed her tenderly on her lips. One of the sweetest kiss they had shared so far that Bea felt like she was dreaming. Her legs were trembling, her hands took his.

''Why did you kiss that woman?'' the words are out.

''She kissed me. She must've kissed so many soldiers today. She just wanted to thank us'' he said directly, as it was the most normal thing in the world ''is this the reason why you would not talk to me?''

''Yes, exactly.''

''Are you jealous?''

''Me? Are you kidding me? And why should I be jealous?'' she said nervously. She knew he would've figured why she was so upset about the kiss.

He didn't say a word and just looked at an undefined point right in front of him. Dick finally noticed how sweet the scent was.

''You know, that's good. I'm mean, jealousy means troubles. And we have a lot of them, don't you think?''

She felt her heart breaking. She was a trouble, to him. And yes, she was just a game, a release after a though day. Again, she felt that feeling she had when her boyfriend had dumped her, the feeling that she was never good enough, never important enough. They were involved into a war, they were supposed to do their job, but still he could find some time to get physical, but not emotional. She tried with all herself to suppress the tears and just wanted to run away like a little girl, but a drop fell from her cheek, and Dick noticed it.

''Bea, you know if there's something wrong you've got to tell me'' he said with firm and calm voice, which made Bea definitely burst into tears. She was not even able to answer back, to speak: her throat was burning and she was squeezing her eyes to stop the stream coming down from them.

''Bea, just tell me, you know you can.''

''You don't care about me!'' she cried. Bea had had enough of his 'I'm your comrade, you can trust me' tone, which made her feel so hurt.

''What…are you kidding me? I'm here, outside in the cold, trying to reassure you and you dare to tell me I don't care about you?'' Dick answered, almost horrified.

''What am I, to you? An intelligence officer? A good friend? Your personal whore? Just tell me!'' she yelled again, not even thinking that someone may have heard her. She was blazing in anger, and pain, and loneliness. So many unknown feelings had control over her mouth, the beats of her heart and she definitely didn't like them. Dick was paralyzed at her words, but he tried to collect himself. Calmness was his best virtue, and it was the best way to face the topic. Bea couldn't know, but Dick was troubled as well, in another way. Dick knew he felt more than attraction for the young Captain; he had felt something since the very first day. Not that it was so important: it was just a feeling, a light he saw in her eyes and a voice in his mind telling him something, but he could not remember what. Since they had got so close, Dick could not help himself from thinking of her all the time; sometimes, carrying on with his duties was so hard to him, since he could not get her smile out of his mind. Bea usually tried to behave like a man, saying she didn't care about love, that she didn't even believe love existed; but Dick knew it was a mask. Dick knew she loved him, even though she had never tried to admit it. The problem was simple and clear: there was a war, they were officers, they had duties and had no time to act like a couple.

''There's a war where we are now. There are poor civilians dying and oppressed. There are our men bleeding on a battlefield trying to protect those people. We are involved in all this; we are officers, Bea. You may think I don't have feelings for you, that you're just a way to relax after a day spent yelling to my men to move, watching out for some snipers and having my men's blood on my hands. But you're not. You're more than that, you're definitely more than that to me. It's just…it's just so hard. We can't go to the cinema, have dinner in a restaurant or something. I can't love you, even if I think I'm starting to. I can't love you because I have to focus on my men's lives, because our task now is everything. ''

Bea knew he had a point.

''I…just thought we could postpone the topic. Till the war ends. And then, maybe we could hang out. I'd take you to the cinema, I'd take you wherever you want. And we'll forget about this hell. Just…wait. It hurts to me as much as it does to you… '' Dick said, looking at her with bloodshed eyes. He was right, and she knew it. And it was so nice he had thought about a future with her, which made things a little better. Still, there were so many things she didn't know how to explain that troubled. But it was not the time to think: in a perfect night, the wind was caressing their skins, while Dick had slipped out next to Bea, hugging her close, breathing in her ear. In a perfect night like that, they forgot the word Dick had just said, and war disappeared in the clouds. Bea had her eyes still opened watching the sky and found herself thinking that even though they had some chances to be intimate, they had never been so close before. She closed her eyes, knowing that Dick Winters would've focus about his men, but would've found the way to make her feel loved, even during the war, just like a perfect night like that one found its way.


	9. An axiom

**I told you this was coming soon ! I had a great time writing this one and I hope I succedeed in communicating what I wanted. This is one the most important chapter of the whole story. Actually, when I first devised it, I thought this one had to be still far from a ''romantic-side'' of Bea and Dick relationship, but words came by themselves and... I don't want to tell something more. I only want to say that I wanted to communicate all the feelings that really make Dick and Bea's relationship, including fear, sweetness, rationality and passion. These are hard feelings to link, and I hope I succeeded in :) **

**What's more...well, since I told you that _''words came by themselves'', I guess my grammar is not going to be the best you have seen; just remember I'm not a native speaker, that I'm italian which very, very far from English :) just forgive me and, if you don't mind, you can tell me some (or all) errors that I made; actually, criticism and reviews in general are always well-accepted and if you want to make me happy...well, some English-tips are even more accepter hahaha_**

**_Ok, that's all. Enjoy ! :)_**

Bea still felt guilty, since Operation Market garden didn't go as they all wanted to. She knew part of the problem was due to the bad collaboration between the British Army and theirs, but she had to admit the Intelligence Officers had their part of the fault, since they hadn't foreseen such resistance by the Germans. What was done was done, and she had to carry on. They were still in Holland, protecting their areas. It was a tough task, since they could not fill all the gaps on their lines and Germans soldiers could penetrate in their areas easily.

They had landed in Holland in the early October, and it was November now. Things were drastically changed in a month. For example, Dick was promoted to Battalion XO; that meant he got a larger responsibility, since he now commanded three companies. He should've been so proud of him, but everyone (also Colonel Sink)knew that he missed Easy a lot. Moreover, since he was an executive officer, he just had to help Lieutenant Colonel Streyer with all the paper- stuff he simply didn't care of doing.

Lewis was promoted to the Regimental Headquarters, and everybody wondered why Bea didn't succeeded in taking that place. Nor did Lewis know why he over ranked _his Captain._

It happened some days later Dick's promotion. They both worked for the Battalion, and this put them very, very close. Dick needed Bea to fill all his reports since he was not so familiar with them. They had worked together before that, but this was different: they now worked next to each other, and Dick _needed _her every day and night, lost in his sheets of paper that he had started to hate very soon. And Bea tried to help, when he was not caught by his anger against all that paper-job that he could not stand. Bea thought he was so cute: confused and frustrated, he looked so tender when he gazed at her, exhausted, and begging for help. There were times, when she was trying to explain him how to fill a detailed report, when he looked at her tenderly and smiled at her, a smile she returned almost sheepishly. These were the only stolen moments they had for themselves since their staying in Holland. One day, Colonel Sink irrupted in her office, made her some questions and exalted her talent and activity as Intelligence Officer.

''_Captain Laurenti, I have to admit I was perplexed when they sent me a woman, an officer. When I first met you, I saw a petite woman with small shoulders, unable to support the weight of a war. But now I know I was wrong. You're a hell of a great Officer, and the greatest Intelligence Officer this regiment could ask for. Despite what happened with Operation Market Garden, you've been excellent.'' He said, sitting at the chair right in front of her. Bea didn't know how to react at those words. She was a bit uncomfortable at knowing that his superior didn't want her in his regiment, but she had to admit she was highly glad and proud that he had changed his mind and that considered her as a ''hell of a great Officer''. _

''_Thank you sir'' she only answered. Sink smiled at her and got up. He got close to the window, watching some soldiers training and screaming. _

''_You know, Captain, we have a gap at the Regimental Headquarters. We may need you.''_

''_Are you offering me a S-3 promotion, sir?''_

''_Let's say yes.''_

_Bea was taken aback. She was a twenty-five- years old woman, the first and only Officer in the entire Army and God knew why she was already a Captain, working for a Battalion. She could not lose the chance. Suddenly, a flashback crossed her mind: her and Dick, around a desk, working so close, his dreamy eyes looking for hers. If she had accepted the job, she would have not helped Dick anymore. _

''_Sir, I'm so glad you thought of me for that place. But I'd prefer to stay here, with the Battalion. Moreover…I know someone else who could behave even better than me.''_

_Colonel Sink had a great consideration of Bea. He said he was sorry she hadn't accepted but took her suggestion. That's how Lewis Nixon got to the Regimental Headquarters._

When Lewis was promoted she started to feel guilty: she was so concerned to have Dick all for herself that she didn't think she had put his best friend away from him. Then, Bea figured why the Regiment wanted an Intelligence officer in more: since the gaps on their line, an Intelligence officer was needed to bound the second battalion and the regiment, so Lewis was still around Dick, maybe even more, and she regretted not taking the chance.

When they got out of the first line to the historical camp of Mourmelon le grand, Bea noticed Dick looked even worried. What was troubling him, was the future of his (ex) company: Lieutenant Heyliger, who had taken command over Easy, was shot and transferred to an hospital in Albourne so Easy was now in the hands of a new Lieutenant, a replacement: Lieutenant Norman Dike. Dick didn't know very much about him but he heard he was _put _in charge by _someone_, and this was enough to know. Bea and Lewis started to notice that Dick's concern was visibly affecting him and decided to make him a surprise.

''_I'm going back to Albourne to see a certain lady. You, my friend, are headed to Paris, the city of lights.''_

_Lewis threw the pass on Dick's desk. Dick looked at it reluctantly and was about to refuse, but at Lewis' ''bon voyage'' and take-it-and-go-or-you'll-tie you-to-a train look he accepted the offer. _

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

When Dick took the train, he didn't know what Paris would've set aside for him. Anyway, arriving at the station was already a big deal since he figured out he was not the only one who got a pass to Paris; so, he found himself trapped into a mass of soldiers laughing, yelling and pushing him. This first beginning made him think his trip was not going to be funny at all. When he got to the city center things were not so different from what he found at the station and was not even able to enjoy a coffee by himself since there were sole soldiers sat behind him at the bar, pushing, laughing who got Dick even more bothersome. He spent the rest of the day wandering around the city. He actually needed some rest, but the latest events were still scratching his mind: the face of that young kraut still occupied his mind. Someway, Dick could see himself running through the dike, his breath always more heavier till he reached for his objective. The first thing he saw was a young boy, smiling at him as he was his friend; then, the expression on his face changed when Dick grabbed his rifle tight, pointing to him. The sound of the rifle shot which dropped the young boy dead was still reverberating in Dick's mind. Dick decided he needed some rest and headed back to his hotel: a hot bath was all he needed.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

He hadn't got the chance to take a bath in a long time, and it felt like a dream to him. In the privacy of an hotel room, Dick felt the hot water penetrating in all his pores, burning and washing away every sin he had made, purifying his damned soul. It felt like a bapthesim, a new born. For the first time in months, he finally had no thoughts tormenting his mind. Every minute he spent in the bathtub was simply regenerating his body. When he got out, he heard a violent knock on his door and rushed at the entrance, thinking that his staying had come to an end, that he was already required back in action.

''Hey, I was wondering: do you have any idea who's the ''young lady'' Lewis is seeing in Albourne? I had this question in my mind for two days and decided to come here to ask you since you probably know something I don't know. Can you invite me in? So that you can enlighten me about it ?'' Bea said without even taking a breath. Dick was speechless: he could not expect her to join him there.

''I'm taking your silence as a yes, ok?'' and she found her way into the room, checking it quickly ''nice place'' she said accomplished.

''What…what are you doing here?'' Dick finally managed to say.

''Well...I guessed a quacker like you may have found hard to enjoy such a city by himself so…I thought you needed help'' she answered and drew a sly smile on her lips. Dick chuckled at her with his eyes full of joy. Though he knew he needed a break from the military world, seeing a known face was a pleasure, especially _her _face. Bea found her way to Dick's bed, sitting on it. On her way to his room, Bea was more than nervous: they hadn't talked about their relationship for months and just enjoyed the chance to work together; since some days ago, she thought that was all they needed, and all she needed: a simple way to enjoy the other's company, without hiding. She reached him in Paris, and she exactly didn't know why. Working together, side by side, was still very intimate, and his knowing and tender looks were enough to her. They hadn't talked about their conversation happened in Eindhoven, but Bea knew something had changed: they didn't feel the need to touch the feel the bound between them and even though they hadn't shared sweet moments together, Bea knew things were getting serious. But, some days before Dick's depart, her mind was crossed by a crazy idea: to follow Dick to Paris to bring their relation to the next level; actually, she didn't really knew what ''next level'' stood for, but she knew that it was the moment and that had they have the chance to stay alone, things would've been way more different from the last time they got intimate. When she _rushed _into Dick's room, she hadn't notice in what condition he was, and just in that moment, sitting on his bed, she had a flashback of a day, belonging to a past which seemed very far, when she had entered into his billet to find him half-naked, with just a towel around his hips. She remembered how embarrassed and, at the same time, aroused she was at that view, and that first feeling she felt that day came back to her in that moment, even after all that time they had spent together till that moment. She felt her face turning visibly red and burning and she found herself biting her lower lips and then looking down to her feet in embarrassment.

''Hey, is everything alright?'' Dick asked, noticing that something was up to her mind.

''Well…it's nothing. It's just…d'you remember our…first kiss?''

Dick smiled tenderly at her and went to sit right next to her and started to caress tenderly her hair ''of course I do'' he whispered in her ear and planted a kiss right on her cheek. The touch of his mouth, that she hadn't forgotten but she had missed so much, sent shivers all along her spine. She felt, just like that day, like a little school girl at her first kiss.

''Well…I had a déjà-vu, you know…that night, you had a towel around your hips and… ok, that's stupid'' she chuckled, embarrassed that she was carrying out such topic.

''I like taking showers, or baths, when I have the chance to.''

''Well…that's good.''

A silence which seemed to last eternally followed her last, stupid comment. Bea didn't exactly know what was happening to her, but she was already getting familiar with that feeling since everything was definitely different with Dick; everything she did with his was like it was her first time doing it. Her hands started to tremble a little, something he didn't notice. What he realized, was how flushed she was.

''why are you so embarrassed?''

''Me? Really?'' she answered ''pfff…and why should I be embarrassed, Mr. Towel?''

Dick made a look of thinking prior to answering ''well…because you have an handsome officer right next to you'' he said, trying to get even closer to her ''kissing you in a hotel room in Paris'' and with that, he started to plant short kisses on her cheek.

''Really? And where's this handsome officer? I want to meet him ! Could you introduce us?'' she said wryly. Dick stopped kissing her for a moment, just to give her a questioning look and then decided to focus his attention on her neck but, this time, his kisses were slow, and lustful.

''So you don't think I'm handsome, uh?'' he whispered while still kissing her. Her fingers grabbed the mattress tight but she could not help but let out a moan that clearly answered to Dick's question.

''I was told your famous for your humility'' she managed to say, even though she found speaking quite hard while he was now biting her ear. _Damned. _

''Well…'' he said, deciding it was the time for some tease that had been missing for so much time ''since you don't think I am, I am going to stop…I don't want to upset you…''

''Don't even dare to'' she ordered, and she felt his low chuckle echoing in her ear. There was something about him way different from every time they had the chance to get intimate: she could not exactly tell what it was, but his touch felt more secure, the look in his eyes and the chuckle on his lips seemed to tell he wanted to _play _a little. Obviously, Bea did know what kind of game he had in mind, and was eager to discover what kind of player he was. She knew that conversation in Eindhoven had changed everything, and she could bet that everything he would've made to her was an expression of not just the attraction he felt, but especially of all the things he felt for her, all those things that he usually and hardly tried to suppress, but there and in that moment, the war seemed and aside world, and the way he fiercely bit her neck, leaving her purple hickey that she would've found hard to hide when coming back to the reality. But for now, none of them didn't seem to care.

Bea could not explain how Dick Winters could kiss in such way, communicating lust and love, passion and tenderness at the same time. In the same way, Dick started to unbutton her shirt, and she let him do it. Then again, she could not explain how in the hell she found herself naked, laying on Dick's bed while he was on her. Bea could only tell that Dick Winters was just inexplicable. His whole body on her moved in different ways: the part going from his hips and down was harshly thrusting against her, still teasing but on the edge to find his way in, while his mouth whispered sweet words in her ears, kissing her sweetly, and his eyes shone bright and looked at her like she was the most precious treasure in the world.

His first thrusts were intense and made her moan loud as she had never done, but when their bodies got to move together like one he started to slow, trying to enjoy every minute and looking at her intensely into her eyes. His groans were a sweet melody to her ears since they proved he was liking what was happening; but what really turned her on was his look: even if he had those bright, icy blue eyes, they seemed to burn but, at the same time, they communicated an almost divine serenity as he had reached the Nirvana. When his lips started to move weirdly, she thought he was on the edge but, this weird movement of his lips continued for too much, and so she realized what was happening. Words were trying to find their way out of Dick's mouth. Realizing what was happening made a small tear fall from her eye. Dick didn't say a thing: he just leant down to kiss the part of her face the teardrop had wetted. When they both came and Dick hadn't said a word yet, Bea thought she had misunderstood. Then, he pulled her close to him, planting a kiss on her forehead. His hand constricted her to look at him; Dick took a breath and planted a last kiss on her nose; then he firmly stated, as it was an axiom _''I love you''._ Bea was speechless and just let Dick pull her even closer to him.

''Dick? Are you asleep?'' she asked, some minutes later.

''No, I'm not.''

''I love you too. And…I really mean that.''

Bea heard Dick's chuckling and decided to just let the moment be, and felt asleep in his arms.


	10. Thus spoke Zarathustra

**I think I am in a creative mood hahah I just could not stop to write today. I think this tenth chapter is going to be a big surprise. Actually, I'd like to introduce a character who's going to be a regular in the story and who's one of my favorite: Eugène Roe, that I esteem so much. From this point, the story will actually see more Easy men, mostly Roe and our Wild Bill...but I don't want to anticipate anything hahaha Just celebrate the tenth chapter with this big BOOOOOOOM. **

**(It contains some French expressions; you can find the translation below the story :) )**

This time, the knock on his door didn't stand for a glad surprise. In his bathrobe, Dick opened the door to find a short but sturdy man, the one who ran the hotel grabbing a telegram in his hand.

''Good morning, sir. Is it you Captain Richard Winters from 101° Airborne division, 506° Regiment, second battalion ?'' the man managed to read in a very forced English.

Dick stood at the door, listening to the robust man reading something he probably didn't even understand.

''Yes, it's me.''

''This is for you, sir. And breakfast is going to be served in one hour. Sorry for disturbing, sir.'' The man gave Dick a sheepish smile, obviously understanding he was talking to a bigwig of the Army.

''Thank you.'' Dick closed the door, and made his way in. Bea was still sleeping: the blankets left most of her body uncovered. Dick chuckled with the telegram still in his hands; he looked at his wristwatch: it was 7.05 a.m. He realized that a telegram, brought directly to his hotel room at such hour could not definitely tell good news. He opened the small envelope.

''It seems like decided to upgrade and put on a bathrobe on this time, uh?'' Bea asked wryly, stretching her arms and letting out a loud yawn. Bea got up and reached Dick, taking the telegram off of his hands.

''What's that?''

''I'm afraid we're needed elsewhere. We've got to leave Paris as soon as we can.''

''Why?'' she asked, now inspecting carefully the telegram.

''It doesn't say but…I guess it's urgent.''

Bea was as disappointed as Dick was. Their love-journey had just started and already come to an end. They obviously knew they would've got back to their duties eventually, but there were a lot of things to do, and more to talk about.

''Hey…'' Dick whispered tenderly, taking her chin in his fingers ''we knew it was not forever…''

''I know…I just whished we had more time.'' Bea said pouting. Dick wrapped her waist with his arms to pull her close to him.

''Hey…what happened last night…it means a lot, to me.''

''Either to me, Dick'' she said desperately.

''So we have to behave like we did before: it's just a break, and a step forward our future, Bea. See it in this way, ok?'' Dick whispered tenderly to her.

''Ok'' she forced herself to say, and also to believe it. She knew it wasn't simply a step forward their future: a new mission involved new risks.

Bea collected her clothes, had a fast shower and was ready to go before Dick, who noticed she got ready in _his room_, and wondered if she had one.

''You know Bea, they're going to look for you too, to warn you about the news…shouldn't you go back to your room?''

''This is _my _room'' she winked. Dick understood that his lover, with his best friend's help, had devised everything perfectly. With no time for more questions, Dick got himself ready as well and they both went to the station.

On their way back to Mourlmelon le grand none of them said a word. Sometimes, their hands looked for each others, when they both thought nobody was looking, and tangled together and tight, just to break up when someone was around.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Maybe Bea should've looked to those American soldiers who were leaving Bastogne and she should've felt fear for what was coming on; she just adjusted her rifle on her shoulder, looked for Lewis and leaded the way through the woods with a courage that she had never felt in his life. The cold was already freezing her bones, and she was sinking into the snow making walking hard to do, and her trousers wet. But she didn't care: when she turned back to check where the rest of the battalion was she found Dick's smile, giving her a knowing and tender look, which she returned with the warmest of her smiles. With Dick behind her with three hundred soldiers behind she felt safe. So no, she didn't care about the cold, about her wet clothes, and she didn't even care about what was coming on. Feeling safe in such scenario was a big deal, and she decided it was enough.

But her safety started to be at stake very soon. The second battalion was only in defense of the area, at least at the beginning, and so they found little resistance. The problem was the same they had in Holland: they could not cover all the area, so there were many gaps and the enemy could penetrate easily through their lines. But the worst had not come since the day they finished all the supplies: some of the soldiers managed to find a way to cook whatever they got, but food was never enough; moreover, they could not be supplied since the fog made it quite impossible. Without food and clothing, Bea started to foresee that this one had to be the hardest time they would've had throughout the war, and she didn't know how much it would've longed. She knew they could've been put in attack very soon, or later. This was also the time she cursed the day she entered into Intelligence: in fact, she had to check by herself the line at the darkest hours of the night, when the temperature lowered to _very fucking freezing. _

Nonetheless, the worst hadn't come yet.

It was one of those days, you know, when her stomach was literally devouring itself, when a man from company E came to the Battalion ''headquarter'' (just a tent) and brought three bowls, to her, Dick and Lewis. The soup was cold, and it stank, but both Lewis and Bea literally snatched them out of the soldier's hands and since Dick didn't want any, they took his bowl too.

The following day, both Bea and Lewis cursed the young cook.

''How are the things going here?'' Dick asked, just to receive Lewis Nixon almost throwing up on his shoes ''I think this is a ''not bad'' answer'' Dick said wryly but visibly worried.

Doc Roe took the temperature to Lewis and Bea and realized the problem was just a bad alimentation.

''Doc, what's the situation?'' Dick asked Eugène with his hands in his armpit.

''It's not so bad. It's not fever, their stomach is probably too delicate and they must've eaten something bad'' Roe said, obviously not worried about the two's health conditions, which was a signal they would've recovered soon.

''You guess?'' asked wryly an ill Lewis ''I was served with caviar in the previous months.''

''Here's what happens when Harvard and Yale folks decide to live as common folks'' Dick said playfully before to face the young Doc ''so…how much time will it take to them to recover?''

''Well…'' Eugène paused, just to give a quick look to Lewis and Bea ''Captain Laurenti is recovering fast. She hadn't thrown up so much during the latest hours. I guess two days, maximum three and she'll be ok. As far for Captain Nixon…he's not doing so fine. I guess it will take a week, sir.''

''But…it's just a sort of indigestion, right?''

''I'd call it gastroenteritis, sir, but it's nothing. Maybe Captain Nixon ate more than Captain Laurenti did, but he'll be alright. I'm going to check them regularly sir, so that you can do your job serenely.''

Dick was still visibly worried. He ran both his hands over his face, and restarted to tell Eugène how having his two Intelligence officers out of the game, even for the moment, was a big problem.

''Sir, I think I have a solution for that'' Eugène said, biting his lip blatantly concerned about something that Dick didn't know yet ''I made a check on the line this morning sir, to see how man were doing. Joseph Liebgott…well sir, he may suffer some fatigue.''

''Fatigue?''

''Yes sir…maybe you can have him here at the battalion for the intelligence…he speaks German, you could use some help.''

Obviously Dick preferred someone with more experience, but he had no other choices; moreover, he knew that a soldier feeling the fatigue could've put his own life and his fellows' at stake, so probably having Liebgott there was a good solution.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

As Eugène Roe had foreseen some days previously, Bea recovered faster than Lew. When three days had passed, Lewis was ready to get back to his job, and offered himself to do the night-check since Bea had been doing it during all the days Lewis could not do it.

It was 3 a.m and Lewis had just left their foxhole to make a check when her stomach started to burn and she bended over herself in pain. Fortunately, the new intelligence officer found himself on Bea's way and noticed she had something wrong.

''Is everything alright Captain?'' Liebgott asked.

''Liegott'' Bea managed to say, with gritted teeth ''call the Doc, fast!''

''Yes ma'am'' Liebgott answered, astonished at how Bea was visibly in pain and disappeared in the woods to look for Eugène. The moment Joe ran away, Bea threw up in her foxhole.

''Much better now.''

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Eugène asked Dick to call a jeep; he could not understand what was going on with Bea but he knew she needed real meds since her illness didn't stop. They headed to Bastogne and reached the aid station. There, Eugène met his new friend, Renè, a Belgian nurse with a sweet smile on her face, even though Eugène hadn't never seen her hands cleaned, always dirtied by blood.

''Hello Eugène. What brought you here?'' she said, smiling tenderly at him.

''Hello Renè. This is Captain Laurenti… she's ill. She… throws up, I think it's viral or something.''

''Oh… Captain, we're going to take care of you. Follow me.''

Bea followed the young nurse with Eugène by her side and reached for a room where she lay on a real bed, surrounded by wounded. Renè gave her some meds and told her to have a rest for a while.

''Did you check her regularly ?''

''Yes, I did.''

''And do you feel good?'' Renè asked him worried.

''Yes, yes I do Renè'' he answered, trying to reassure the young nurse. Renè smiled back at him and gave a fast look to the Captain.

''I don't think it's viral. If it were, you should be ill as well.''

'' Do you have any idea of what she has?''

''I don't know, Gène. I gave her some meds to stop the illness, but if I don't know what she exactly has I can't really do nothing at all.''

Now Eugène was looking at his Captain, visibly worried ''and what do you suggest to do?''

''Here, around, there's a real medic. He doesn't come very often but I guess today he's going to make a check. We can use his help. Are you in a hurry?''

Eugène checked his wristwatch and realized two hours had passed since they got there ''actually…they may need my help back at the battalion…I think I should go. Can you take care of her? I'll try to be back as soon as I can.''

''Yes, of course Eugène.'' She answered, smiling tenderly at him and putting her hand on his shoulder. Eugène smiled back at her, noticed that her hands were still dirty as always, but he didn't care; he took Renè's hand in his and kissed it gently.

''ok, I'm going. Take care of her, and of you.''

''That I do.''

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

It was late night when Eugène came back to Bastogne. Captain Winters gave him the permission to go back anyway since everyone at the battalion was concerned about Bea's conditions. Eugène could not understand what was going on. Renè was right: it could not be something viral since he had spent the last previous days always next to Bea and he was good. Then, she felt ill sporadically. Eugène was an expert in all the kind of wounds, but he was not prepared to such a thing and hoped the medic did know what was happening to his Captain. When he reached the aid station and the room where Bea was, he found her quite good, eating some chocolate.

''Eugène!'' he heard a female voice calling his name before he could talk to Bea.

''Renè! Has the doctor seen her yet?''

Renè looked turned up her nose and made a worried look.

''Yes, he has.''

''Bad news?''

''No, Eugène. She's doing fine, she's alright. The medic prescribed her some meds that will stop her nauseas.''

''Fantastic!'' Eugène exclaimed enthusiastic, but calmed down when he noticed that René was not as happy as he was ''René? What's wrong?''

Renè looked at him, still worried and swallowed hard ''Listen, Gène. Doctor Luarée visited her while she was asleep. I told him about the nausea and he checked her temperature. Then…he made some others checks. He said she's pregnant, Gène. Those meds he prescribed will stop the typical pregnancy nauseas.''

Roe had his mouth and eyes wide opened and could not believe to her words.

''Is he sure?''

''Yes, he is Gène…He checked. She's pregnant. Thirteen days.''

Eugène looked at Bea's direction. She noticed and smiled at him and while the chocolate bar still in her hand she made him sing to join her.

''Did you tell her?''

''No. I wanted to tell you first. I don't know how it does work in Army, in such situation, but I don't think your superiors are going to give her their compliments.''

''Neither I think'' Gène looked back at Bea, still enjoying her chocolate ''ok, I'm gonna tell her. Excuse me.'' Roe reached for Bea and sat on a chair next her bed.

''Hey Roe! You know what? I'm feeling great! Let's go back, I guess Captain Nixon is going to be mad at me for jumping my night check.''

''Uhm, don't worry about him. You stay here, ok?'' Eugène said, trying to reassure her, but his tone made her know that something was wrong.

''Doc, what's wrong? Tell me !''

''Captain…''

''I got a tremendous disease, didn't I?'' she answered all worried.

''No, absolutely not Captain'' Roe said ''you're right, you're fine. The doctor that visited you prescribed you some meds that will stop your nauseas.''

''Oh…well, that's good. But why do you look so…concerned?''

Roe swallowed hard and took Bea's hand in his.

''Do you mind if I call you Bea?''

''No I don't'' she answered curtly ''now tell me what's wrong, Eugène. That's an order.''

''Bea…you're pregnant.''

Bea opened her mouth wide brought her hand to it in incredulity; the leant her back against the pillow of the bed.

''It can't be. The doctor must be wrong.''

''No…he's not.''

Bea ran both her hands over her face and then look up to the ceiling.

''Bea…I'm not going to tell anyone, but you must leave the Army. It's not safe here, for you and for your baby.''

''leaving the army? Are you fucking crazy, Gène? Do you know how much I worked hard to be where I am? Do you know how many sacrifices I made?'' Bea yelled at him in anger.

''Bea you can't…''

''No discussions ! I'm staying!''

Roe felt something tipping at his shoulder.

''Gène? Can I have a word with you?'' Renè asked.

Roe breathed harshly and got up from the chair ''Sure''.

Renè brought him into another room so that Bea could not hear.

''I know it's none of my business but… your friend can't leave the Army unless she tells why and she'll be in trouble if she does. So… since she wants to stay, let her do it. If pregnancy goes as it should, she can be around for five months at least. ''

''René, she can't be in the cold, freezing her ass, with no food and in serious danger doing her job! D'you understand it?''

''That I do, Gène. But we'll find a solution. Listen: she's not going to get away anyway. I know this feeling. I would do the same. She wants to be useful for the cause, Roe, as you do. She has the right to do her job.''

Eugène knew Captain Laurenti was well-known to be stubborn and that his words would've got her only more upset.

''what do you suggest to do?''

''I'm going to look for some bread and all the food I can provide. I'll seek for some blankets as well. If she feels bad, you'll take her here and we'll call the doctor, ok?''

''And what will it happen when we're going away? Or worst, when we're going to attack?''

''One day at a time, Gène.''

Roe knew he had no other choices. He got back to Bea and explained to her how they would've acted. She was visibly concerned and just listened to Eugène nodding at his every word.

''Bea… you can still leave and…''

''No discussions, I told you.''

''Don't you wanna…you know, warn the father at least?''

''No, I don't'' she answered sharply.

''But you know who the father is, don't you?'' Roe asked almost sheepishly.

Bea froze at the question. Of course she knew who the father was. She felt a ping in her heart since she knew she could not tell him.

''That I do, Gène.''

Eugène waited in silence, thinking that she was going to tell him the father's name, but the name didn't come and so he decided to give her some time to rest in a real mattress prior to heading back to the battlefield, where she would've spent all her pregnancy.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

When she woke up, it was early morning. She found Eugène sleeping on a ruined sofa with his friend, the nurse who took care of her while he was away. Deciding he needed to rest as well, she went out for a walk after taking her pill. It was not as freezing as it was in the woods. The town itself was very suggestive. Bea had lived in Italy during her childhood and then moved to California, so she hadn't really got the chance to enjoy snow and being in the woods, with nothing good in her stomach and wet clothes made snow a torture. But now she was fine and could enjoy it completely. She took some in her hands and figured how soft it was. Walking through the streets she could definitely tell that once the town was even better since most of the buildings were destroyed and it looked like everyone living in Bastogne left but the medics and the nurses. All the stores had planks blocking the entrances, most of the shop windows broken into pieces. Actually, she was starting to feel like she was walking in a haunted town when she jumped into a little book shop, and she could not help herself to get in, as she was moved by a magic power or attraction. When she opened the door, a small bell rang and instantly an old and thin as a stick man appeared behind the counter.

''Vous désirez quelque chose, madame?''

''Uhm, no no, monsieur uhm… Je regarde seulement'' Bea managed to say in what she thought her better French. The shelves were full of old dusty books, which made them even more appealing to her. She hadn't read for a while. She was glad to notice there were all her favorite authors: from Svevo to Lorca, from Shakespeare to Joyce, and so on. There were also some philosophy books: Plato, Schopenheur, Feuerbach…she could not believe her eyes. Then, one of them caught her attention: ''Thus spoke Zarathustra'' by Friedrich Nietzsche. She tenderly smiled, remembering a time when she had explained to Dick the principles of the German philosophe; it seemed like a lifetime ago, when things were easier, normal and… she put her hand on her belly: Dick Winter's baby was growing in her and weirdly, she didn't feel so confused and frustrated as she was when Eugène gave her the bad (or good) news.

''Combien coute-il, monsieur?''

''Trois francs, madame'' the old librarian said, smiling at her. She looked for the money in her pocket and gave it to the man.

''Merci beaucoup, madame''

''Pas de quoi, monsieur, bonne journée.''****** She greeted and got back from the little bookstore. Christmas was coming, and she already had the perfect present for Captain Winters.

**Do you need something?**

**Uhm, no, I'm just having a look**

**How much this?**

**Three francs**

**Thank you very much**

**Not at all, have a good day**


	11. Of bread and blankets

**Ohhhh, I loved writing this one, too ! I hoped I portrayed Eugene Roe as he deserves to; I really appreciate the way he doesn't care about the rank when it comes to his ''patients'' ' health. Some Bea and Dick's tension is coming in this chapter... but I won't tell you more. Here it is ! :)**

When she got back to the aid station Eugène had just woken up and welcomed her with a loud yawn.

''Bea, where did you go by this hour of the morning?'' he asked all concerned.

''Just taken a walk, doc, don't worry''

''Bea, you've got to be careful, you can't just go out by your own and…''

''Please, Roe'' she interrupted him ''I'm not a child, I can take care of myself. And I'm feeling good, trust me'' she gave him a reassuring smile before taking the conversation up again ''and, you know I'm going to take some 'walks by my own'', since I'm the Intelligence officer.''

''Maybe you can avoid that…''

''Roe, I'm fine'' she grumbled.

''Ok'' he simply answered, knowing that going too far was just effortless. Meanwhile, Renee was reaching for them carrying a big basket full of bread with her.

''Here it is'' she said, and gave Eugène the basket, which seemed very heavy ''that is all I found. Next time you come I hope to get some more.''

''Thank you Renee'' Bea said ''you're so sweet.''

''Oh, you're welcome. You're so brave, I really admire what you're doing. You have all my support. For everything'' the young Belgian said, wearing a sweet smile on her face.

''So, I guess it' getting late. We should go.''

Eugène and Bea headed outside, where a jeep was already waiting for them. Eugène put the basket in and then tried to help Bea to get on the jeep, but he noticed she had already done it by herself.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

''Here'' Bea told to the driver ''Thank you.''

Bea got down from the jeep quickly and put her helmet on. The show must go on, she thought. With Eugène behind her, she made her way to what was supposed to be the Battalian Headquarter just to find Dick, Lewis and Colonel Sink in, all around a table.

''Alright Nix, what's the situation like?'' she heard Colonel Sink asking.

''Dog has the right flank of Foy, Easy stands right in…''

''Nix, I guess the Colonel already knows where they are'' Bea said, just to catch the others's attention.

''Bea!'' Lewis exclaimed, visibly glad to see her back ''how are you doing? We were all so worried'' he said, going towards her to give her a long hug.

''I'm fine Nix, it's all ok now. And I'm ready to be back at work.''

Colonel Sink approached the two grabbing his can with one hand and shaking Bea's hand with the other ''I hope you've recovered completely this time, Captain. The Battalion has missed your performances. Actually, the one picked by Winters to replace you didn't really fit the role. Too rough on the prisoners.''

''Liebgott?''

''Yes, him.'' Dick said from behind the Colonel.

''Oh, I hope you sent him back to the men !''

''He asked for it. I guess he missed them.''

''Cool…'' Bea just said, clearly astonished by how Dick was being cold to her. Maybe it was because Sink was around. She hoped it was so.

''So, if you're ready, there's an attack to be planned'' the Colonel said, pointing to the map on the table.

''Yes, of course sir'' Bea said, clearly glad the good Colonel thought she was highly necessary to set up a plan. Meanwhile, Eugène joined the group, still carrying the heavy basket.

''Eugène'' Dick said ''where in the world did you find all that bread?'' he asked, clearly eluted that the young doctor had brought so much food he hadn't seen for a while.

''Uhmm…Back in Bastogne, sir. Actually, this is all for the Captain.''

''Darn it, that's even too much! What is she supposed to do with all that?'' Lewis asked, his eyes shone bright at the thought of sharing all that bread with Bea.

''Uhm… Captain Laurenti is still recovering and… the doctor back at the aid station told her to eat genuinely.''

''Oh…if it's so…That's ok'' Lewis answered, giving a smile to the Doc. He didn't mind eating the same poison that made him throw up even his soul for days, he just cared his friend was alright. On the other hand, he noticed Dick turning his nose, and Lew knew that he'd rather share the food with the men, since it was too much for Bea only. Obviously, he did not say a thing. The four gathered around the table, and together tried to devise a plan for the next mission.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

One day off the line and Bea forgot how cold it was there and how the wet fabric made sleeping impossible. Eugène had managed to find some blankets in more, but they just weren't enough. Still, she could feel her skin burning. René told her that her temperature was going to be higher than the normal. Eugène told her he would've made a check on her regularly, and so did he: every two hours, he reached for her foxhole, asked her if everything was alright and then slipped for some minutes next to her, in order to exchange body warmth. That's why when she felt someone slipping in her foxhole during that night, she guessed it was Eugène, and found herself surprised when she noticed it was Dick instead.

''Hey''

''Hey…''

''Where did you get these blankets?'' he asked.

''Eugène gave them to me. I don't know where he found them.''

''It seems like our Doc has incredible abilities in finding useful things.''

''Yeah…I guess so.''

''How are you doing, then?''

''I'm fine Dick'' she answered curtly, visibly annoyed at the fact that Dick was probably wondering why Eugène gave her those blankets and found all that bread just for her.

''It's good to hear'' he said, almost forcedly. Bea could literally feel the distance between them, but she could not explain why. He had been so cold with her the day before, when she had just got back.

''So…Eugène is taking good care of you'' he stated, clearly pointing to something.

''that he is, Dick'' she glared at him, trying to see his game through his eyes. After all that time, she guessed she could see it right through.

''But you're ok, aren't you?''

''Yes, Dick, I told you I'm fine'' she answered roughly, starting to be irritated by his insistence.

''So why does he check you so often?''

''I'm still recovering, Dick, it's his job to make a check to the men, and to me'' she said, now clearly annoyed since she understood Dick was thinking they had something going on.

''Well, it's quite weird since you spend most of your time together and…''

'' Are you serious, Dick?'' she almost yelled at him ''He's a medic, and I was sick, and he's just taking care of me! At least, someone does it!''

''Hey, what d'you mean? That I don't take care of you?''

''No, you don't!'' she now literally yelled, and betted someone would've come soon ''since I got back you hadn't even asked how I was, and if you hadn't noticed Eugène around me you would've never asked!''

''You're being unfair, Bea'' Dick said defensively, deeply knowing she was right. He had had so many things running through his head that he hadn't even asked her how she was before.

''Am I? Look: I know you'd even want me to give the blankets and all that bread to the men, oh because I know you want me to, and you're telling me you care about me? Or about my health?''

''I care about you!'' Dick roughly said, being pissed off by her unfair statements ''it's just that you stay here all the time, while our men are out there in the front line in the cold and starving…I didn't want to…''

''Do you want me to give them to the men? So I will do it!'' she interrupted, and quickly got on her feet, taking the blankets and heading back the Battalion Headquarters to take the bread.

''Bea, come here! We haven't finished yet!''

Bea was already just a figure disappearing in the night and fog, and Dick could not help but think he was just an asshole.

''Shit.''

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Blazing in anger, Bea used all the forces she had in her body to take the heavy basket around the men's foxhole.

''Hey, you there'' she said roughly, as the two soldiers woke up and looked up at her ''that's for you. Enjoy'' and she threw them up some bread. The same procedure was repeated for the next foxholes she jumped in. When she reached for Bill Guarnere and Joe Toy's one, she was eluted to see Toy back.

''Hey, Toy, it's good to see you back, buddy!'' she greeted him warmly.

''It's good to see you too, Captain. I heard you hadn't been doing fine.''

''Oh, it's all ok now. Hey, take some bread. I have two blankets here, too. That's all for you'' she hand out all that stuff to the two soldiers and gave them a warm smile.

''Oh, thank you a lot Captain!''

''You're welcome, buddies!''

It was nice to notice that someone was actually glad to have her back. As she got off their foxhole, she felt someone grabbing her by her wrist.

''what the hell are you doing?!'' Eugène asked.

''I was ordered to give all the bread and the blankets to the men since they need them much more than me'' she curtly answered.

''You need them too, Bea! Who the hell told you to do so?''

''Captain Winters.''

''What?'' Eugène said, astonished, since he could not imagined Winters could've ordered to do so ''Look, I'm going to have a word with Captain Winters'' Eugène said, and was already on his way when Bea reached for him, grabbing him from his arm.

''No no no no no! And what do you want to tell him, uh?''

''That he behaved like a total dickhead! How could he do that? He knows you're…recovering! ''

''What's wrong here?'' Bea and Eugène turned to see that Captain Winters was already there, giving them a questioning look.

''Captain Winters, sir'' Eugène said, approaching to the Captain ''I don't want to question your orders sir, but w_hy in the hell you ordered Captain Laurenti to give away her blankets and food, sir? Do you know she's still recovering? What the hell were you fucking thinking! Do you want her to feel sick again?!'' _Eugène yelled with all the air he had in his lungs. That was not the first time Captain Winters did something stupid, like he did the night Moose Heyliger was shot. Even though he was a good Captain, he was capable to fall on very important things, like that one.

On the other side, there was a Dick Winters, paralyzed by the doc's reaction, who was not afraid to talk in such a way to a superior.

''I did not order her to do so'' Dick replied, trying to save the situation '' I just thought she could…share them…''

''Share?'' Eugène interrupted '' You lack of manners, sir! Every man in Easy Company, and in this fucking Battalion, would've never asked a woman to give away her proprieties, especially a woman who…'' Eugène stopped, since the words that he could not say were just about to be spilled out ''who got ill'', he only added.

''I…I'm sorry, Gène'' Winteres replied, lowering his head.

''It's not to me you have to apologize, it's to Captain Laurenti'' Eugène said, trying to calm himself down.

''It's alright, Eugène'' Bea said, putting her hand on his shoulder.

''Bea…Captain, I'm sorry, I' m very, very sorry.''

Bea could not believe her eyes, or she didn't want to. The man in front of her was apologizing for depriving her of food, and that was the father of the child she was carrying, even though he didn't know. Bea just accepted his excuses, deciding that she had enough for the day, and that she was too tired to tell him how disappointed she was about him or to even explain w_hy_ she was so mad at him. She made her way back to her foxhole, and hoped she could use some sleep before the sun to rise.

Some hours later, she heard a voice calling her name. she opened her eyes and managed to see a Dick Winters with a basket in his hands, full of bread again, and the blankets on his shoulders.

''I told the men there was mistake. They understood. I feel…so ashamed, Bea. I behaved like an asshole. I'm sorry, I'm very sorry.'' Seeing he would not get any reply, he put the basket down and reached her to cover her with the blankets. Then, he leaned forward and kissed her on the forehead.

''I…''

''Don't dare to say it, Captain Winters'' she said, putting her hand on his mouth to stop him. Dick gave her a sad look and got away. A tear fell from Bea's eye, that she dried quickly.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Bea woke up at 5 a.m. to make her morning check, and then reported to the Battalion where, obviously, there was the last man in the world she wanted to see.

''So, I made my way through the first line and tried to see what's going on among the Krauts. I could not see their tanks, but I bet they're here. It seems like…Captain Winters, are you listening to me or am I just wasting my time?'' she asked, clearly upset since he was gazing into space and probably was not even paying attention to her morning report.

''Oh, no, I'm listening. Please, carry on.'' He answered.

After spending two hours trying to catch Dick's attention on what she was saying, she finally got some free time. Damn, she needed it so much. She could've betted she had done those things so many times and never got tired so easily, but everything was quickly started to be so… hard to do.

She heavily slipped in her foxhole, where Eugène was already waiting for her.

''Hey Doc, what is it? You ran out of patients so I'm the only one you've to take care of?'' she asked wryly.

''I see you're in a good mood today, that's good.''

''Good mood? Ah, I would not say. I'm tired as hell and I haven't done anything to be so. Then, I spent the last two hours communicating my report to a wall, so…''

''You started talking to walls? You know, if you need a friend, I'm here…''

''Oh, shut up! It's just that Captain Winters didn't seem to be so interested in what I was telling him…''

''Uh, I see…'' Eugène paused, remembering the latest events happened between the two ''I see you got back your stuff.''

''Yeah…Actually, he brought them back to me.''

''Uh, well, that was nice of him.''

Bea didn't answer and just gave him a knowing look and then ran both her hands over her face.

''I can't do this, Gène.''

''Do what?''

''Being…a mother. And all alone! It's just… It's just not me. I'll be a bad mother. And… what if this baby is out when the war is still on? Should I take him with me during my night or morning checks? This is crazy… I can't.''

Eugène saw her struggling, and hugged close ''oh, Bea, don't even say that. You're a wonderful woman, and I'm sure you're going to be a wonderful mother as well. And…just take it one day at a time, ok? You don't know what the future holds.''

Bea seemed to be relieved by his words, but still she had that sad look in her eyes.

''And… you're not alone. I mean, maybe you should try to contact the father, don't you think? Obviously, I'll take care of you till I can, but you may need someone else when this whole thing will be over.''

Bea just could not avoid but give him a short snort of mockery ''yeah, right, the father'' she said, lightly ironically, something that Gène noticed.

''So…where does he come from?''

''Pennsylvania.''

''Oh, so he's American. And…I suppose you met here in Europe, since you are sixteen days pregnant.''

''Yeah, let's say so'' she said, showing no interest in talking about that topic.

''I'm sorry, maybe you don't want to talk about it… It's just that maybe talking to this man could do you some good, don't you think?''

''Yeah, I think I'll be constricted to do it, someday.''

''Yes, someday. Now, let's just not think about it. He's faraway, and we're here freezing our butts in the snow'' Eugène tried to come out from that topic, but Bea seemed to get even sadder at the thought.

''Hey…what's wrong?'' he said tenderly, taking her chin in his hand.

Bea tried to keep her eyes wide open, in order to not let the tears fall just right in front of Eugène.

''Bea, just tell me. Don't you ever think I may tell someone, or that I may judge you. I'm here to help, even just listening'' he tried to reassure her.

''It's that… He's here, Gène. The fathere, he's here'' she sighed, already on the edge of the tears.

''He's…here? Here in Bastogne?''

''He's here, that means is something like one hundred meters from me.''

''Is…Is he in the Army?''

''Yes'' she answered, forcing herself to not burst in tears, not even knowing why. Maybe because she was still hurt for what happened the night before, or maybe because she didn't want to betray Dick, but she could not keep the secret any longer: she was alone in this adventure, and Eugène was trying to help and he was the only one who knew. The young doctor, who had now his helmet fully covered by the snow, had his eyes lost and mouth opened.

''And…is he a paratrooper?''

''Ok, Gène, let's cut it off. The father is Dick, Captain Winters'' she just spilled it out, and she felt suddenly relieved. Oh ! that was not so bad ! But… Eugène was now completely in disbelief. Of course he was: how could he imagine that his perfect Captain had something so big to hide? Eugène was not even sure that women were something Captain Winters cared about; all focused on his duties, Gène could've betted he hadn't never heard him talking about women as, for example, his friend Nixon did. He just seemed to have most important things to care about; and, nobody thought he had something going on with Captain Laurenti, since he always behaved professionally around her and never showed to be involved in other ways. But he was, damned if he was !

''Bea…'' Eugène finally managed to say ''I guess you hadn't told him.''

''Of course not! And what is he supposed to say? ''Go away''? Or ''I'll take care of you''? ''I've just built a love nest for us''? C'mon, Gène. I want him to be focused on this whole thing so that it could end very soon. Then, I'll tell him.''

''Sorry for asking…'' Gène said, sheepishly as it was really none of his business ''but, the thing between you and Captain Winters…is it serious?'' he managed to ask, afraid he would've touched a painful topic.

Bea seemed to really meditate on such question.

''He told me he loves me. Twice. Or once: when he came to bring me back the blankets and the bread, he tried to, but I stopped him.''

''Oh…And do you love him?''

''Yes, Gène, of course I do !'' she said, almost in disbelief that he didn't know, since it seemed like the most obvious and normal thing to her.

''and does he know that?''

''Well…'' Bea told him she loved him back, but she stopped him when he tried to say it again to her, so maybe he was thinking that she had changed her mind.

''Listen, you may not want to tell him that you're carrying his baby, but I think that for your own sake you two should get on. ''

''I guess you're right.''


End file.
